It's not working

I was hoping that Chanel could help me forget about Julie. She made it worse. I now know more about why I miss Julie so much.

Chanel (I) limited my time of DFK but when we kissed she was very receptive, with hands on my back and some caressing. Well, maybe not during kissing but she did. She also understands that within the hour, she is my girlfriend, my mistress, my wife, whatever I want her to be.

Caroline is like making sure that the new good catch will become her boyfriend. She goes all out to capture your heart, lingering kisses right after I go into her door. She would also deliberately pick up any tiny detail to remember so as to impress you, feeling that you are special.

Julie was far from GFE since I knew her. But when I ran into her again last year, she became not GFE but GF !!! When she was riding on my cock, she would look at me all smiling and then suddenly dive down playfully and kiss me with tongue. Went back to riding and repeat. Yes, you can act but you don't really need to go that far out to lock your client. I would think we have some chemistry and she would be rather fond of me in a way. And she isn't the only one nor the best one. I had to limit myself kissing her and sucking her tongue; my donations don't deserve that.

And when I give her a lingering lip kiss, her tongue would slowly creep in between my lips. Once I was so unexpected that I almost jumped. That kiss even got into my dreams though for some reason it was Carter kissing me.

Caroline and I foreplay with clothes on while still standing. This is even more GF than Julie. But when Julie kiss goodbye and then hug me with her face on my chest, every time was like last time. That's why I didn't feel the difference until I want through all the details after, trying to remember everything about her.

Chanel? She just laid there when I was on top fucking and kissing her. Otherwise no hugs no kisses. I don't think she's always like that or she wouldn't be so popular and still standing. Going straight to the point, I think she has a few issues with me.

Perhaps it was a mistake that I didn't tell Chanel that Juquittted everything. That I can't see her again. So obviously Chanel didn't want to compete with her friend affecting her business. But unconsciously she is. After she asked and knew about us, she gave me her number and invite me to visit her even before she moved. When I texted her 1st time to take that up, she didn't reply. But when I turned up during her incall day, she asked indirectly if I went to Julie instead. Without provocation, she criticized Julie's makeup and showed me her IG pictures. When she showed me her panoramic view of her new apartment on her app, I asked if I can see a landmark. Immediately she knew I was trying to see if I can see Julie's apartment from there. I think we both have too much Julie in our minds.

And then there are her boyfriend issues. #1 is doomed; I don't think any male can handle that, knowing that your girlfriend is a working escort. #2 is doomed because she doesn't love him and he is just nice, not even "taking care" of her. I think that means financially. Her less than enthusiastic text, when she even replies, maybe a way of deterring me for finding love in her. But then she couldn't stop herself from telling me her deep secrets. My good relation with Julie shows that I can be professional and she shouldn't be worrying about me looking for a girlfriend. But if she thinks that Julie and I have something more than professional, she is out of her mind.

So I booked her the 2nd time just to see why she wouldn't reply to my text. So I believed her everything when she was so competitive with Julie. She even agreed to see me before she moves. But when I texted her again asking her when she is turning up to play again, the answer is an unenthusiastic "maybe" on the weekends. I wasn't after that anyway. So I asked her if I could see her before that. No reply. OK, that's a no but can you do better? The best I can imagine is that she really didn't want to leave traces for the boyfriend to discover. But then she showed me her list of callers, telling me that I'm not special having her real number.

I was going to take it as a further test. I was going to see her in yet another hotel and secure the 1st booking at her new apartment. But it was hard. I really needed some lovely feeling that day. Even if I can see her that day it would just be an investment, wouldn't satisfy my craving.

I began to think of Caroline a lot. We just start passionate kissing with clothes on and after all said and done, she would be on top of me passing the rest of the time left. But I need to set up some conditions before seeing her, can't do it all of a sudden. And she lives so far away.

The alternative may be to find somebody to torture. I found one but she is as far away as Caroline.

Then I came across an agency with a girl in town. I never used this agency before but I had good experiences with similar agencies using European girls. Not the type of cute girls I'm more used to, but classic escort style with long blonde/brunette hair, bikini body, tall and leggy on sexy heels. May not be totally GFE but no problem kissing and cuddling. That was the description of the last one I had. Her face is a bit funny in a good way but a smoking body at about 30. I was wanting for some GFE but more importantly someone gorgeous from head to toe that I can lick off, preferably with heels on.

Since the agency advertises late nights, I booked for 10 pm. I didn't think that the lady would be busy. That was a mistake. I was early, texted them 10 minutes before the appointment. I waited for a total of 30 minutes. I cancelled and ready to leave when they offer me a discount and that she was ready.

It was very disappointing for an agency. She wasn't overbooked because she had jetlag. Probably she drove from far away, they couldn't wake her up, or the room was overbooked.

But it was a total disappointment from any such agency girls. She has nothing outstanding. Average face, not in good shape, not tall and rounded. What do you expect? My last girls were all models or lookalikes, with personal trainers and a stripper in her prime.

But well she is kissable and lickable, nice boobs and a big ass. The price isn't right but I rather not go home unsatisfied. So I held and kissed her with clothes on. Her dress is sort of sexy covering her average body. She backed off a bit but didn't turn down the kiss. I went forward for more. Again she backed off a bit but didn't turn me down. I let her off when she did some tongue play with me.

It is one of those nights that I was craving for big juicy tits. BTW, I heard that work out will keep you natural tits small. Probably true. I sucked and licked and sucked. All the girls I mentioned above are small to flat.

I was mentally prepared to kiss, lick and suck the girl in the picture. I still did. But mostly on her tits and her ass and pussy. Her legs and feet wasn't in the best proportions but at close range, they were smooth and clean. It is one of those one night stands that I wouldn't worry what she would think of me, whether she still like me after. I did what I like at the moment until she ducked or said no, like fingering her.

I came on top of her, stayed a bit, then rolled over to enjoy my nap. It would be better if she cuddles me but she didn't. I didn't bother to ask. I did what I set out to do and I would be happy to go home after the nap. Most women will worry about if I could get up again in time. I don't bother because I wouldn't normally. I had to assure them that I am done; I just need some recuperation.

She was nice to offer me massage, on me or her. The last time Chanel checked that I couldn't be revived and then sort of leave the bed. The first time we met she actually asked me to leave early; she had a VIP coming. I was going to tell her that for the rest of the time she is still my girlfriend and she should think of something to entertain me. But I never had the chance.

So I wonder why agencies will want to fly these average girls here? Maybe they come by themselves and find some agencies who would take bookings. I don't know. I wouldn't bother with these girls. But they are doing it like 10 years ago, a beautiful website, a beautiful gallery for each girl and beautiful pages with details and great reviews. The girls maybe real or generic. I would think the lady who I booked could be anybody they can find at the time. But then she really came from Europe on a plane with a heavy accent. Any never again for this agency.

I was so nice she really thinks that I would be back. But I tipped her anyway with the remaining of the cash in my wallet. Happiness is contiguous. She would not remember me if I never visit her again. (It may be one of the issues with Chanel.) So she couldn't be sad. I feel sorry for her for her averageness. But then I think the money will be good for her talents.

She escorted me to the door that Julie and Chanel don't. She is a bit rounded and at the door, she turned comical. She asked for a kiss goodbye and that was good. What she said kiss means something else. She moved her lips forward so I kissed her. Then she turned over with her ass up. No problem, I kissed her ass again and spanked her. Then she raised her feet high. That was unexpected; so I had to kiss her feet.

Reality is how you see it

Conway will be remembered as the person who made a major advanced in human mutual understanding, between sexes in particular. It's always suspected but not proven. Now every man and boy have a concrete understanding of what is inside a woman's mind; that thing called alternative facts.

In this game of sex, every companion has to deal with it one way or the other. Chanel I is a professional liar. She can do it effortlessly while you can't easily find holes in it. There is a subtle difference but Julie bullshit through it. She is very convincing but her lies don't pass the test of time. How do I know? Chanel (II) told me the other side of her that fit my experience. As for Chanel, I don't think she knows the truth herself!

So I gave up booking Chanel directly and went through her assistant. She wanted to see me after all. But then it was bizarre at first. No, it was bizarre throughout really.

"Don't text me every day, I have my private life!", she complained the first thing she had the chance.
"You told me to see you at home. And I ever texted you two messages!"

She claimed not to have remembered on the first message. And then I think she deliberately remembers me as another person to put me down. Then she didn't reply anymore. So I tried once again the next week when I could go to see her. No reply again. I wasn't going to talk about it nor complain about it. I wonder what game she is playing. If you don't reply I can't see you.

Just as she was trying too hard to put me down on texting, she managed to bring up Mrs Player, her boyfriend, and whether I'm fully or partially retired even before we had sex! Whhhat? A lesser person will lose his erection instantly.

Incidentally, I had something to do that day so I book her late in the evening. I told her the truth that it was a long day for me and I would have a problem performing. So she blamed it on my stress and there wasn't anything to do with her behavior.

Very understandingly, she worked very hard to relief my stress and frustration while I just laid there resting on the pillows. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't make me rock hard with her blow job. I didn't want to see her exhausted for nothing so I asked for the condom. I made it into the cowgirl. Again, she could ride all day while I just laid there watching. So I lifted her up and put her back down flat on the bed without ever pulling out. I tried to come fast and furious. I sucked her face and then her mouth non-stop. If she passed all that we could have a beautiful friendship with mutual benefits - money vs sex. I had no doubt she did want to see me again.

But I failed to come even though I gave her a good fuck. So I ordered the final handjob. She was a bit surprised that I had no problem with my ego. Actually, I enjoyed if it comes to that. The more mature ones are best. Avery and Caroline would see me eye to eye romantically and understandingly while doing it. And of course marathon lingering kisses. It was actually on the first date with Julie. There were no kisses but she was unexpectedly sweet, looking at me with all the smiles in the world.

Chanel wouldn't do any of that. But that didn't stop me from grabbing her and kissed away until I came. At the start, she asked me if I did it myself so as to last longer. But I proved myself my coming like buckets. She cleaned me up quick to avoid getting the bed wet all over.

So it was all a test. She told me she remembered me. She didn't reply because either she was with her boyfriend or that all the messages were deleted from the car because she didn't want to get caught. And she has a good reason to not remember me at first. She got a lot of texts. She actually showed me her phone! How awkward. I'm that not special. I don't want to know. It doesn't make enough sense but she saved my number in front of me with a long name consisting of words to remember me by.

I still call it bullshit. Who else you would invite to see you at home? She admitted that it was nice for Julie to take me home. (If she only knew.)

I still think that she remember me from two years ago even if she doesn't look at my handle and account beforehand. How can you explain that she brought up Mrs Player the same way, before and after sex, both times I booked her? I asked why she brought up Mrs Player all the time and she promised not to do it again. No explanations. Is she jealous of her? Is that her way of reminding me not to try anything funny, like trying to be her boyfriend?

It turned out that she has two boyfriends. One is for love. He knows what she does but doesn't want to handle it. So he dates other people. She doesn't like it because she doesn't want others to share his love. The second one treated her very nicely. He doesn't know anything and he doesn't take care of her (not paying her and not supporting her). She told me she isn't attracted to him at all. What a surprise! If that's her way of deterring me from seeking love, it's a total fail. I wouldn't want to be in any of their shoes. She is totally open and vulnerable.

Would you go around and tell every client that you have a boyfriend? Or even two? No. I think she respects me, the one who went home with Julie. She is dying to know what's between us. She can't live while I know more about Julie than her. They haven't talked since over half a year ago. Julie even changed her number; I think it was after I texted her walls of text and then promised her to let go.

I asked her if Julie is gay because from what she told me Julie has been so nice to her. And that she wasn't that good to me. But she told me that Julie is good enough to me because she took me home.

She told me their group once went to see a very scary movie, those that will have ID checks. Not all of them passed, LOL.

Just happened that I forgot the money in the car; it's a long day. After the shower, I put on my clothes to get it. I left my phone inside so I wasn't sure the room number even after I took a good look before I left. I was confused because she took off the no disturb sign after I arrived. She texted me if I will be back but of course I didn't receive it. Yes, it's so fucked up I could have left. But I won't need excuses. If I do it I would have insulted her with half the money, just like what I did with Chanel I.

The stack of money was thick enough but she took the chance to count it in front of me and apologized for it. She tried so hard to say that our relationship is purely professional. Yes, but you are supposed to be my girlfriend within the hour. And whatever happens in the hour stays in the hour. I don't know why, even Caroline the over 30 teen model told me that she now has a better boyfriend while still wants my business.

It was more complicated in Chanel's mind. She doesn't want to steal her friend's client but she also likes to win. She actually will move next month into the classy apartment she told me last time. She didn't but she insisted that she told me last time that she hasn't moved in yet. I think her current apartment isn't as good as Julies but the new one will cost twice as much.

Without prompting, she criticized Julie's heavy makeup and asked my opinion. She even dug up Julie's Instagram pictures for me to see. It happened so sudden or I could have got Julie's account name. 

Ahh, why everybody has a personal trainer? Should I get one too? The two girls may meet again at the downtown gym and share the same trainer to save some money.

I'm quite sure that Chanel didn't read any of my shit anywhere. She may change her mind about visiting her in her new apartment. It will be very difficult with a doorman.

She remembers me

I'm that unforgettable. Chanel remembers me from over 2 years ago when we met once. That's the only explanation.

That's why she had a strange reaction before I told her we met before. That's why there's all the interrogation about Mrs Player. The abrupt change of mood and tune. She is a straight shooter, relatively speaking, but that doesn't mean she doesn't lie.

Try patron somebody and then disappear for a couple of months; that's applicable to most industry. A madam once complained that she could have starved to death. I shouldn't have told her that we met over 2 years ago.

For her, I think she needs to keep her pride. I saw her once and then forgot all about her. But I kept seeing her buddy! And why would I see her again after so long? Very likely I will disappear again. And she wouldn't care too much; I'm just another client.

Now I had very good reasons but I couldn't manage to tell her all about it. She is the kind I'm afraid of; that's why she is Chanel (II). I wouldn't even see her long ago if not for Julie mentioned her name for unknown reasons. She's the one I could be addicted to. That's why I wouldn't see her if I didn't have enough cash reserve. I wouldn't see her if I didn't want to involve with someone long term.

I wasn't afraid of Julie. When she came back I just booked her to see if she improved. No. But she did when she last came back and I accidentally booked her after a could be near death experience. I wouldn't have missed her that much if not for her lingering kiss with tongue.

I wasn't afraid of Caroline. I just picked a blonde model type before I went into semi-retirement. I don't see how I can be attached to her. But her kisses made magic on me. Still, the affair lasted only a couple of months. Though she still wants my money when she has a boyfriend now.

So Chanel was thinking of reasons that I didn't see her after the first time. And she showed me the I don't care attitude when before I expressed that I want to see her again.

She would have felt jealous when I didn't see for so long but I managed to go home with Julie. She regretted giving me her real number because it was so unfair. I was so good to Julie while I didn't think twice about her. I think she played me on the phone. She remembered me but pretend otherwise and tried to make me jealous in return. She has nothing to lose because I might not see her again.

And it would hurt her pride when I booked her again only because Julie quitted on me.

Now I have to turn on all my charm and woo her back. Given half the chance they want to put me on a leash because they like me and I'm such a nice person. Julie really wanted to keep me but wants to see me on her demand. I still feel somewhat special but my brother doesn't work that way.

Drama drama

So I waited more than a week to book Chanel (II) on her "real" phone number. Less than a week will be too desperate. Any longer they will forget everything.

Whenever I get a girl's private number, usually there are dramas. A girl freaked out when I called her after more than a month, interrogating where I got her number. When I tried to book her, she asked me to go through her booker instead. I waited too long.

And then they may give you a fake real number for more tips or something. Chanel I gave me one number that she ditched. It was the 2nd time that she gave me her real real number.

So far Chanel was great, very enthusiastic to see me again - at her home. It wasn't a total waste of time on Julie (Margarette). My credit earned from Julie got transferred to Chanel. The only negative of her is that she didn't remember me a bit. Although it's several years ago, people don't usually forget about me.

So I texted that I miss her. I was ready to book her tonight when she replied. Sometimes you have to wait an hour not knowing where she stands. Sometimes nobody replies on the other end. But I saw Chanel texted me from her own phone.

She replied in less than a minute, no surprise there. But she said that she didn't know who's calling because she didn't add a contact, and gave me a crying river emoji. That was a lose lose situation. I can't imagine such a failure.

So I gave her some hint for her to remember who I was. Worse than not remembering, she guessed the wrong person. That was insulting and turn-off enough. And then she "hangup" - not replying.

So I thought when she remembered, based on what Julie told her, she doesn't want to see me anymore and blocked me. Fair enough. Not a big deal since we saw each other only twice. I will forget her long before I forget Julie.

The other possibility is that she didn't remember anything so she remained silence just in case. So I don't really know if I should invest my time on such a failure in customer service. Julie kept silence when I first texted her. It was when I used Whatsapp with a profile picture that she replied.

There is one more possibility. She prepared the act ready when I called to discourage me from seeing her again without having to give me reasons.

It isn't her fault for remembering another person when I saw her just one week ago. For any other person, I could have passed her over and try somebody else.

For a few minutes, I almost decided not to see her again. When will the drama end?

Since she hasn't quit, she will come out to play as soon as this weekend. I think I may try her booker. I don't know if he will let me through. If it's time to say goodbye, I would talk to her face to face.

Oh, Caroline!

When I see you in trouble, I must help. Oh, yes, I'm that sweet, thank you.

I offered to park outside your home to watch over you because I don't want you to think that I did that to you so I can rescue you, coming into your house and see you again.

You are so sweet too wanting to see me again. Maybe I shouldn't talk about money, that I am lacking. I thought that, like in the good old days, you just hang up on me. Or in the good 2G days, your voice somehow faded, asking if I could still hear you, and then static and then cut off.

You didn't. But you told me that you have a shitty boyfriend all along since you live there and you now found a new better one. I'm happy for you but why? Am I the type who want to be your boyfriend? I'm certainly not that naive. In addition, we are totally incompatible other than just sex.

But I'm still surprised how honest you are having a boyfriend while earning extra money. It seems like a non-issue to you. But I bet waitressing is so much harder than escorting that you don't give a damn. Or is it all a lie to build a wall between us so I will not cross the border?

Anyway, we shall meet again when I have a bonus.

And I almost forget that you are an actress too. Did you do it to fool me? What a coincidence when I just published my stories that I fucked 3 girls across the Valentine week. I was desperate, being dumped by my ATF just before Valentine.

Yes, I'm not totally broke but I cannot spread myself too thin. I respect you and don't want to lowball you. If I ask I am afraid to commit. You can always come down to compete with the likes of Chanel directly. Then I don't know who to see.

But we had our moments. You are my most passionate kisser. That's a compliment even for an actress. But when I'm with you I feel like you have someone else in your mind or something else. I don't need to be your boyfriend but I need to feel that I am in a date or an illicit affair. Traveling a long way to Hollywood to fit into your schedule or someone's lunchtime doesn't cut it. Give Chanel a chance.

If I were the scriptwriter it will be after dark. I'll leave my car in a dangerous space. I'll brave the dangerous streets, the homeless, gangsters, juveniles; I do what it takes. You will leave the gate open for me to sneak in. I'll feather tap on your door when you cannot wait to open it, in your simplest and sexiest outfit. The usual model look will be super, it kills me every time, but the laundry look or the French look will be excellent for a change. And candles in you slightly hoarding living/bedroom. And romantic music from your iPhone or laptop ...

We meet again

I was expecting Chanel II to quit but in fact, she was just skipping the Valentine week. When she turned up, I got an instant notification too because I left a PM complaining that she was elusive. I booked her as soon as I could find a place to park. I had to wait for her to check-in though. That's when I thought of eating an apple to stop my hunger while not having to clean up all over again.
I was so disappointed she didn't recognize me at all when some of the bookers do. She even asked me why I was so happy as if I found her looks funny or I had an agenda to humiliate her.

I told her when and where we met. It was a long time ago she said. She acted as if she remembered something but I bet she didn't. Rarely anyone will forget my handsome face. I was so disappointed when we had sex and got along so well.

I was really the check-in guy; the bathroom floor towel was dry and hanging. There's no reason to fool me. I wasn't so sure about Margarette. Once I caught her up before noon. And since I was her fan, she might pretend that I was the check-in guy while seeing somebody first who got advance warning of her arrival.

I was testing her DFK repeatedly to see if she changed like Margarette. I gave her chances to duck always but I overdid it. "Fortunately, you don't smoke.", she said with a plain face. Yes, she changed a bit, doing more but less enthusiastic.

Otherwise, she changed! She might be even skinnier. She was wearing her schoolgirl outfit with a little vest showing off her flat chest, the flattest of them all. But she was a bit taller like a model if she stands up straight. She now has wavy long hair instead of the short schoolgirl hair that I remember, correctly or otherwise.

She did have some makeup on, darker in the eyes, unlike the model who pretends to be the girl next door. She isn't as cute as before but pretty enough; nobody wants to be head to head with Chanel. The same with Mrs Player when she was younger, unless you are much taller like a model.
When I went over to the meat in her small tits, the strange thing happened. She started asking me if I have a wife! What? I did mention Margarette; that's how I came to book her. And nothing else. What was she thinking? No idea.

Maybe the only conclusion that a perfect man like me had to patron pretty escorts is that I had a wife with an unhappy relationship, or just having a wife.

I told her she looks a bit different when she asked if I liked it. I went over to check her feet and toes. They were well pedicured and pale over and under. She asked if I liked it. It was such a good start.
When I flipped her over, she told me I am very kinky. She had no problem when I admired her pale ass. But she told me I shouldn't be tickling her. So I had to lick her harder.

When it was her turn, she got in position to blow me but was collecting her hair strand by strand into her hands. Instinctively, I held all her hair for her when she began to blow. I don't know if she was trying to keep her beautiful hair from getting in the way or was showing off for me to watch. Chanel didn't even like me to watch her blowing - the beauty and the beast.

Again she was very enthusiastic to give me a good time but soon found out it was trouble. It became thick rebar and had no signs of weakening. Soon she used her hand to get me more excited but it was too late. I became invincible. I just let her because whatever she did with her mouth and hands, she just couldn't do anything other than making me harder. When she knew I wasn't anywhere near climax, she sucked very hard to bring me closer but in vain.

Since she failed to soften the blow, I told her to move on. I picked up my non-latex condom on the nightstand trying to put it on. But she grabbed it and did it for me. Even though both had long nails, Margarette did the opposite; she would open the condom and pass it to me for DIY.

If she wasn't afraid of my cock, she is a very good actress. She tried to mount carefully and slowly at an odd angle with her right hand totally attached to the side of her body. She pulled out when her pussy barely touched my cock. Very elegantly, she brought out natural lube from her mouth into her curved palm. When she spread it on my cock, I could see that it was a handful, like pouring a small cup of water on me.

It wasn't the end of her predicament once she got me inside. She kept talking to herself how big my brother was. She kept the odd angle while going up and down carefully. And her right hand was like glued to her side of her body. Yes, I was her check-in guy but I wasn't too big. How can she deal with the rest? I wonder. She wanted to go fast but she seemed to hit the speed limit due to my thickness.
I put one hand round her back and squeezed her small tits with the other. I was forceful but she probably didn't feel anything; her mind was on my cock. Her awkward body angle prevented me from using full force. I could let her ride all night, enjoying every second of it.

At last, she decided there was no other way. She was like a kid holding up her sleeve while braving for the flu shot. Or the defeated princess walking bravely to the guillotine by herself. She got off me slowly, almost sad, and ceremonially spread herself flat on the bed, arm and legs open, head almost falling off the side. I had many plans and positions, but I couldn't resist her inviting body posture. I got between her legs and into her sore pussy.

I looked at her closed eyes while giving her a few warm-up strokes. I held her head with both of my hands so I could watch her beautiful face while I pounded harder and harder.

She offered no resistance and she knew it would be futile. Then I kissed her deeply and squarely on her mouth. I was holding her head so our teeth wouldn't be knocking against each other while I was pounding hard on her. There was no tongue but it would have been getting in the way. I bet she wasn't thinking about anything, trying to do anything, anything but going into a deep trance. That was her only way to enjoy every bit of my actions or to tolerate her punishment.

I could fall in love that way, not caring about how many men she had sex with in the past and future. It was only me in the present time, in her whole world. [note to self: perhaps I really should write a book.]

It was the perfect way to end a lingering kiss, a kiss she couldn't have escaped. I let off her mouth and put my face against hers. I held her tight and started fucking her as if tomorrow will never come. Anyway, I couldn't climax in any other way at that stage. It was beautiful when I was finally done. A few times when I thought I was done, I gave her a gentle stroke before pulling out, only to find myself shivering and shot some more.

When I was finally done, she was like a kid who just lost a game and threw a tantrum, with her back on the floor while waving her arms and legs fiercely in the air to protest. She fucked me while I was still on top, totally useless by then.

I rolled over with a very sweet smile on my face. I knew she was staying an arm's length from me because my arms were spread, inviting her to come close. I think she was afraid that I would have another go; it would be traumatic.

The strange thing was that she kept asking about Mrs Player. Why she didn't do it anymore? What did I do to help her? Why she would let me lose going home late at night? She threw off my plans; I forgot what I had to say.

This time I remembered my watch to watch the clock. After her interrogation, I realized that I was a little over time. So I jumped up to the bathroom. Maybe I wasn't polite. On my way she was like happy that I was leaving and she asked me to flush [the comdom]. What? Never had a girl do that to me. Maybe she was saving face.

When I put my clothes on getting out of the bathroom to say goodbye, she could have texted Margarette again like the first time we met. She asked me when I last saw Margarette. "Last month", I pretended to think a little and say so unwillingly because of privacy issues. "Where did you see her?", she asked. Again I answered as if I didn't want to rat somebody, "her home". Again she told me her mom wouldn't let her dad lose like that, going downtown at night. I didn't remember telling her I hang out there at night.

If I had any plans, she worked it all out for me, in less than 3 minutes. She told me to see her in her home when I am there. She kept telling me about her neighborhood by names that I had no idea. It dawned on me that she lived probably within walking distance to Margarette. She said Margarette's apartment was a bit ghetto. She was trying to say that her apartment was in a better neighborhood. I didn't understand first because I didn't even know she lived downtown.

Then she wanted to give me her number so I would have advance warning if she comes to town, or I can visit her. And she made sure of it. I showed her my phone number on my phone and she texted me immediately. Wow, that was easy. Mission accomplished.

Now I hoped that Margarette responded. Actually, Chanel kept calling her Julie. That's the problem if your buddy hooks up with your ex. If Julie replied, she approves of us, and didn't mind what I said to her when we broke up. I also hoped that she will be jealous if only a little like last time when I was in bed with Chanel. She may be glad or upset or both when I can forget about her just like that.

Now it would be interesting if Julie didn't reply. I wonder what she will say to Chanel. She had to keep something from Chanel as I did. Those are only between us and we wouldn't want others to know. I wonder if Chanel will change her mind about everything. I probably like her more but I won't get hurt since it is only the 2nd time we met. First, she isn't quitting yet so I can see her when I want to. There are plenty of opportunities for us to like or dislike each other. Second, I had her real number, got that right in front of my eyes. She would have no excuses.

My Valentines

Chanel II was nowhere to be found just when I needed her most, being dumped by Margarette right before Valentine. I did what I could get and what I had to do. One was a high school dropout, slim cheerleader type. She was into kissing and nothing much else. It was like kissing a school girl with no makeup on, very refreshing.

The other was more of the same type but fuller and rounder. All she worried about was to do what she promised beforehand to keep me satisfied. It was anti-romantic, trigging me to do the very unromantic thing.

I DFKed her when she was blocking my tongue advance, otherwise, she wasn't resisting. I did it again with sufficient time to show that I'm not an easy person.

Her natural perky breasts were fuller than the rest of small titted girls. I fully enjoyed them when she had some caressing hand movement on my back similar to Chanel.

Being rounder, her legs weren't as long but good enough and her toes are decent. They weren't particularly clean so I passed.

One finger, two fingers, I inserted them into her pussy while using my tongue as the 3rd finger on the outside. Unromantically, I went on and on until she went up and lifted my head gently from her.
So I turned her over, spread her legs and went straight to her starfish. It smelled! She was so keen on keeping the schedule that she didn't clean herself thoroughly. Pity that it looked good, though a bit dark.

On this Valentine day, I was so unromantic as to insert my index finger into her ass. She begged, "please don't go all the way!" I should have borrowed her tube of lubrication and went all the way, maybe two fingers. It was tight. But I just did it half-heartedly just because she promised on her menu. Then I jumped off to the bathroom to clean my hand. She didn't hear what I said. She was relieved when I told her again I was going to wash my hands.

Her blowjob was eager and decent. But soon she cheated with her hands to calm down the beast. I held her hand instead. I could have cum but I wanted to try other things, like 69. But then she just covered my mouth with her pussy; I didn't even see anything.

I grabbed the Trojan non-latex and tried it again. This time I was very erect and so I could at least put it on. But it felt a bit smaller than the latex ones.

Seeing how thick and stiff my cock was, she asked if I mind using lubrication. Permission granted and she hopped on for the ride. It felt good trying to be a difficult person. Also, I found out the best way to squeeze small tits during a ride is to put my left hand on her back while putting pressure on them with my right like a sandwich. She wouldn't expect that I would go gentle on her.

When she was easing into the ride, I said the magic word, "spoon". She smiled, got off the horse and turned her back on me without hesitation. I got inside her from behind and I liked the feeling. My two hands were on her two tits pulling her, while my cock was pushing her. It wasn't fast and furious; I left it later. I went slow, deeper and deeper on every stroke, pulling out almost completely without detaching from her.

She was such a nice obedience girl that I had to do the missionary extra. She rested her head on the pillows, spread her legs getting ready for me. I got right into her sore pussy and started pounding heavily. When I got the rhythm, I put my arm around her neck and started kissing her. It was a bit awkward so I threw away the pillows one by one until her head was flat on the bed. With my arm around her neck, I kissed away. Of course, it wasn't just kissing, more like vacuuming. Her tongue didn't come out but I was OK with it. I let her mouth off when I had enough. I didn't want to give her trauma if I decided to come back for her.

I was thinking about coming in her mouth. But it was too late. So I fucked her faster to put in more stokes in the available time. Then I exploded, but kept on fucking her with my still erect cock until the last bit of juice came out. Meanwhile, she was caressing my back. I am not sure if it was supposed to be a pat on the back; I did a good job. Or it was an unconscious sign of relief from her. She didn't push me and her hands were still on my back. But I desperately needed to roll over to rest. Not wasting any paid time, I asked her to keep me warm. She obliged but only to lay side by side with me with her neck over my spread right arm.

I forgot to bring my watch because I decided to watch the clock. But I had a timer started on my phone way. So I rested with her in my arm like I had all the time in the world. She became a bit restless, checked her phone, came back to my arm with her bodied turned over. Finally, she excused herself to go to the bathroom to clean up; she was very polite but didn't ask for permission. Very unromantic, isn't it? Luckily, I treated her like a sex doll since the beginning. I wasn't expecting anything else.

She came out and it was my turn. I showered, put my clothes on, and pulled out completely with 5 min to spare. And I was way early. It was totally unnecessary to rush me out. I will complain about her cleanliness and time management if I choose to see her again. It would have been mood killing if I were in.

The Valentine Letter

Why would you gave me your real number and brought me home when you are about to quit? You don't give a kid a candy jar and then take it away. I love to see you more but not when your mind was not there! I paid for dates. You don't bump dates around. And I don' t want to know if you have plans before or after; I don't think I want to know what plans you have, do you?[

[Note to self: Are you that desperate for the money? You know what's the feeling of being a mobile ATM on demand, and providing the money too?]

I saw it coming that you may quit sooner or later. That's why I asked your number. It was a total fail before I visited your apartment. But I was too curious to see how you live. After that, I specifically ask if the number is your private number. Because I can't and won't deal with that sort of drama. The second time I had little choice because I was already there. Did it look like a date to you?

Sometimes kissing is like a tsunami at first but turns into ripples after a few weeks. Other times it's like sucking from a honey pot, ever so sweet. There is little choice where my money goes.

Why didn't you just tell me you paid off college, moved on, or had a big break, relocating to Vegas for the big times? I would be happy for you. I would still beg for one last time but I know it's silly. You are not the first to quit on me.

Why would you talk about God when you didn't seem to be sorry about yourself? Did you remember that you were with me twice the last month? You were so busy with everything, so cheerful, so full of life, and so much "plans".

Why would you tell me you give up dancing when you still go to the gym twice a day?

For me, it's hard to be upset by working girls. Being on sale dealing with so much is sufficient punishment no matter how much you got out from it. You have been so professional and drama-free except for the very end. You managed to upset me. No worries; this too shall pass.

The Player's Valentine Tips

Decide on what you really like to talk about yourself and build a solid story base on that. So whenever there is a conversation, you can ease into it rather than listening only. There will be no awkwardness when you have to think all the time to avoid saying the wrong things.

It's no good to say that I don't want to talk about work, and the lack of other interests. This the time to think of something or invent something. Something that you like to talk about and wants others to listen to. It's not hard, is it? With a good conversation going, you can get more info out of her.

Don't be afraid to ask questions. Response with questions. If she says busy, ask her what. If she wants to bump you, ask the reason. You are entitled. I was wrong that I shouldn't ask Chanel too many questions. She would have just lied. But that's useful because it's harder and harder to lie consistently. Even the best liars will slip. Chanel used the excuse twice that she drove her mom to the hospital. She could have passed but she didn't use the word again.

Being the Player, I didn't just figure it out. I put it to use.

Yesterday, I decided to cheer up myself. Instead of waiting for Chanel II to appear, which will be hit and miss, I decided on a spinner after examining very carefully all the tits on the classified pictures.

How well I did. Instead of straight out of high school, she is a high school dropout. Remember The Schoolgirl? She was more schoolgirl than Margarette when I first met her. I confessed to having an erection whenever I saw her pictures. A man had confessed to masturbating on her pictures. She is that good, but only for faceless pictures. She isn't ugly but you don't want to look at her that much. Maybe it's so easy to find another prettier face, you wish you can find one with a comparable body.

Ana the dropout has a body comparable to The Schoolgirl. So now Ana should get the title instead. She is small-chested that I love. Very perky and fuller than Margarettes. Ana is slim like a schoolgirl cheerleader so her legs look longer than Margarette's. Margarette has an awesome booty now due to training, but Ana's is better, smaller but absolutely round and tight defying gravity. And of course, the perfect waistline that I saw on all her pictures.

Ana's face is plain and average. But only because she had no makeup on like a schoolgirl going to school. She is more pleasing to the eye than previously The Schoolgirl. When I stared at her face I saw lust. When I stared at her body, of course, I get an erection.

I asked her first if she is a student. It is a legit question because the reason for girls hosting there will be because they want to be near their college right there. Over the years, there is even a recruitment center in cyberspace that recruit mainly out of that college. She wishes she were a student at the college. She is a dropout working on her GED. See, when people like to talk about something they will tell you given half the chance.

When I saw her suitcase I asked her where she came from. An hour drive she said. Unexpectedly this becomes a critical question.

Somehow she asked me how often do you do it? I was surprised by the question. How direct is it? Actually, Margarette asked me recently. We are different as we have so much history and we talked about a lot of things. I can only say no so much, meaning all my money spent I spent on her. She should know that. I don't know if she was calculating if I can be her sugar daddy. Because she thinks I can for my spending history. I can do her regularly as if that's not enough. But I am afraid of commitments. It would look very bad if you know exactly how much money you spend on a girl month after month. A few months is good when the sparkles subside.

Ana's may be an innocent question from a new girl. That will review how much health risk I am and how much effort she should spend on me. I could only answer no so much without preparation. She even had an answer for me so as not to embarrass me.

But my come back is that my friend just graduated and moved on. And it was true to some extent that I know of. She carried on for me, "looking for a replacement". It was like she was doing a job interview. Then her distance from me became an issue. It looked like I was picking her because I think she is also a college student living nearby. She doesn't drive. But then I talked about me driving to her instead. We were serious. She said that we should meet long enough or it's not worth it getting a hotel there. I know. A long meeting? Yes. I drive to her and back? Yes. I do that a few times a week for a long period. But spending a total of 3 hours or more just to fuck seems to be excessive. And there's no point when she is living with her family. I can use hotels anywhere.

She is too new. She would put the condom on before I was erect. Blew me and then hop on for the ride. She was in a romantic mood when I wasn't myself. No tongue but she likes to kiss. I don't want to make the same mistake again. I squeezed her perfect breasts while asking if I was overdoing it. I asked to spoon her and she just turned around and backed up to me. I could have flat ironed her but maybe next time. Because I did the DFK missionary and I came rather quicker than I would love to. I have a whole bag of cum for her to see. Actually, I wanted to fuck her good again today but she left just in time. But she would come back next week.

Owing me, owing you

I have to assume that Margarette was the only one using Whatsapp all along. Yes, she is sorry for quitting on me. But I can't blame her. She is sorry for bumping me around for 2 weeks before visiting her home. I let her walked all over me because I was so curious. She is not sorry for everything else, and blame her booker for them. But she owes me.

Once upon a time, two childhood friends like brothers built themselves a mafia empire. Eventually, they turned against each other. The boss prevailed. At execution time, with a gun pointing to the underboss's head, the boss asked, "Did I owe you anything?"

Underboss's eyes lit up. If he could just think of even one tiny flavor, he could have his life spared. "You owe me a piece of bread!", he claimed excitedly as if his life depends on it.

The day they almost died of hunger while hiding when the then mafia boss was going after them. The underboss had a piece of bread and shared it with the boss to save his life.

While still holding his gun in his right hand, the boss reached out to his inside pocket to bring out a piece of bread, the same type as the one they shared. "Now we are even", the boss said, passing the bread to underboss. Underboss was speechless and stared hopelessly at the piece of bread in his hand. That's when the boss fired.

Margarette was very nice to me the first time in her home. We cuddled and talked. So I brought it up.

When I was going out of the door the first day I met Margarette, I saw the door knock flashed once. When I was outside, I saw a muscle guy going to the lift not far ahead of me. He was very courteous so as not to alarm me. I wasn't alarmed and reciprocated.

What happened was that Margarette told the booker that I was leaving before I gave her the full amount of money after upgrading. Not expecting that I would be paying the full price because I left so early, the booker or his muscle man was going to come into the apartment to get it. After I paid in full, Margarette just had enough time to send him away via text. It was like he was rushing out fast. The door just managed to close itself and hence the flash. Or Margarette locked the door so I couldn't get out so the muscle guy had time to get me. And she just had time to unlock the door and sent the muscle guy back.

I brought it up because I wasn't blaming them. I was saying that Margarette had been mean to me since day one. They didn't do anything wrong. They weren't threatening and I wasn't scared. But I wasn't happy how Margarette thinks of me. She was very sorry for the wrong reasons. She blamed everything on her booker. But she had to text the booker that I was putting on my clothes and leaving. And she had to be concerned to tell him that I hadn't pay the money yet. She wasn't sorry about that.

Since then, everything is a fair trade. Nobody owes nobody nothing.

Once she apologized that she hadn't slept all night and go straight to church with her grand who she promised. But it doesn't help because why would you party all night if you need to go to church? You could have gone home after church instead of grabbing my money. Yes, she did say that she needed rent money. Now it's a dam good excuse. I'm such a sucker. If she said she worked at the club I would be happy. But then she couldn't tell me because I would find out where she dances and broke her compartment - the secret separation between dancing and escorting.

She owed me but I could have demanded how she repaid me. I let it go. But if she was lying about rent money and going to church it's a sin. I was obliged to see her enough since. But the church part was credible the way she said it. Otherwise, she would be way better than Chanel in lying.

Once she ordered chicken strips. I delivered but she didn't seem to be very grateful. It was a bit odd; maybe the booker was playing some games with both of us. But then she gave me a few dance moves while she was eating almost on my lap. We were even.

The other time I was delivering organic lubricant. I couldn't find the brand and had to bring something else. She was apologetic for not willing to risk the lub I brought. I agreed that she shouldn't use it, totally wasting my time and money. And I promised that I would be gentle on her. The problem was that I forgot all about it when I was in the heat of the moment. She didn't complain or gave me signs during sex. But after that, I saw her face more bland than usual. Looking back, she could have said to herself, "this fucking guy." I am sorry for that but she could have just reminded me to be gentle.

I was scheduled to see her at home before Christmas. She called me a week before but I couldn't make it that far. We made it after New Year. She canceled and canceled. The reason was period and sickness, the two most offending excuses for a woman. I wasn't doing anything. She called to schedule and then canceled. I didn't say a word, trying to be the nicest guy in the world. Because I was so curious about her home. If it wasn't because of that, I would have canceled her to eternity, unless she manages to bribe me to my satisfaction. She was super nice that day so we were even.

Then she called less than a week, trying to come over. Yes, I did called her every week before. But that's when I didn't have enough of her, when I had a crush on her. Now it's like an old couple. I'm still hot on her but less than a week? I don't have that sort of money, or more truthfully, I didn't want to spend that much on her.

Then she called me a week after to visit her at home again. You asked me out. I would love to do it later but since you were in the money grabbing mode, I was happy to help you out. But I was happy to pay with no strings attached as always. You asked me to come earlier but with good excuses and politeness. You were free was enough. But I couldn't change my schedule. She still blew me kisses as if she knew that's not very good to ask.

Now, at one minute past the appointment, she was so impatient that she texted me asking where I was. That was very OK but without pause, she told me that she didn't want to start late and she had plans later. That was inexcusable, especially that she seemed to be so mature about everything. And this was the first time she did that. Maybe that's the problem with real numbers (she called it). Bookers won't do that to clients.

That was erection killing. It can be the reason for canceling. It could be so disrespectful. Say, some VIP who was scheduled before me faked on her. So she wanted to bump me up so she could have more time for whatever she was more keen to do later. Do you understand that there is something called undivided attention? The sad thing is that I was almost never late and always leave early. So all my years of punctuation and generosity went down the drain for nothing. She never thought anything of it. I soldiered on because she would have to pay me back sooner or later. But then I didn't know it was the last time.

I told her all that in our goodbye message. But she didn't think much about it and she wasn't sorry. I looked up the old message if I read something wrong. No, I was as pissed off as ever. She replied, "Something really came up."  She never feel wrong! That's not my problem. At least you have to know how late I will be before rushing me. She always assumes the worst of me. Then you can ask me nicely if I could go earlier or we reschedule. I have enough self-respect not to let you walk all over me again for nothing. I could have left just to get back at you. And if you remember every time I was done early, when I was done you could ask me if I would leave earlier. Macey did that. She was so honest that she asked me to leave earlier because her VIP is coming. I actually feel special like helping out a new friend.

Even worse, my bad luck, the doorman screwed up and she was like angry. In the lift, she jumped and pushed me by reflex action when I touched her.

She once told me I was easy. I don't know I should take it as a compliment. But it's a sad thing. But that's the truth. But then obviously she didn't want her tits to be squeezed, against spooning and uneasy about cuddling. So how is that I'm easy when she is difficult?

At her home, she just asked me to flat iron her, both times. What? That's my fav position. Now I know she was trying to give me the best of times. But I thought she was too lazy to put enough makeup on.

Did she owe me anything? Yes, she should be sorry for telling me not to be late and she had other plans after, or something did come up. These other things can't be good, either VIP or something fun for her while I am work. She was never sorry.

Now you cannot give a lot of candies to a kid and then take it all away. Why would I jump through hoops and loops to go to your apartment? If only for two times? I felt so special and you took it away in no time. I don't mind the money but it hurts. Is the money so important? It's yours anyway if you were patient. I understand you were trying to fit me into your schedule ASAP. But you have to understand that the minimum is that I just want to have a good time without distraction and divided attention. I was not so desperate as to bed you no matter what.

Now you knew that it was our last time and you didn't care about it much, other than just the money. It was so hurtful and you didn't even feel sorry about that. I planned to kiss you when I got inside and I did it anyway. I felt better. When I kiss you I did it tenderly to forget everything bad that night. I was so into it that when you put your tongue into my mouth, I was so surprised I almost jumped.

I could have such a good memory of our good times together and you ruined it. It's so easy to do if you think more about me and put some effort into it. You robbed me of those good memories. You owe me.

Epic II

Instead of my wishful thinking, let me put together the most simple story of Margarette, the most likely.

Margarette sugar, escort and dance her way through college. If she had enough daddies, she wouldn't appear on the escort platforms, except for those $750 / 30 min agencies. As time went on, she has to escort more with decreasing clients. When I rediscovered her, she changed her name to be 19 again. She told me it was used to avoid stalkers. Sure you can avoid, but it's easy to be picked up by the stalker again. If I wasn't insisted on something different, blondes, I would have picked her long ago.

So dancing is for her to make ends meet and as a way out when escorting dries out.

It's amazing how many girls provide sex to get through college. German girls for example, never have to do this.

It's amazing that she managed all these on her own. She is cute, on the small side, but has an ora of maturity. She is now a full-blown stripper but a few steps back, she still looks like straight out of high school. But then again there are just these opportunities for her. Even if she got a job requiring a degree, it would be so bad compared to her escorting & dancing income.

Now she graduated, may have paid off her student loans. She can now work full-time and the financial burden is less. Whatever it is, there is a big change in her life. Maybe she found another sugar daddy again so she doesn't need to escort or dance. Or she got a big break working for a top strip club, in downtown or Vegas.

I know her family is religious and she may be too. But quitting everything all of a sudden because of God? Nothing explains the suddenness. I don't buy it. It's OK if she can pay the bills by waiting on gambling tables alone because she finished college. BTW, gambling is also a sin. Why doesn't she know?

Can't she just say relocating to Vegas to dance? So perfect! I will be so happy for her. There is hope to meet again though she can throw away the number I have when she gets ready. I wouldn't know if she moves or not.

Can she just say she graduated or she doesn't need that much money anymore? It's hard to believe but perhaps she hasn't discovered it's so hard yet. I would have wait for her to try. I'll be very happy if she could leave the lifestyle but I will be there for her when she has to come back.

Now, if you are quitting dancing, you don't go to the gym with your personal trainer twice that day before seeing me. I only realized that you have been a stripper for so long because you told me about your trainer that day. I thought it would be a steady income for just dancing and it would be big money if you do sex too. But then you said you don't dance anymore because they want sex anyway, and you are doing it already.

But if you don't dance anymore, why would you go to the gym that much? Last month membership? It was early Jan. And you are also quitting escorting too. Yes, suddenly you are quitting everything except for gambling table. But even if you can find casinos within commuting distance there, the traffic will be hell sometimes. Downtown has some decent apartments but I would have moved closer to the casino.

I would love to think that she tried not to hurt me one way or the other since we first met. There's always the calmness on her whenever we met. Like the time she asked calmly if I knew Macey as if she is not worth my time, Macey is more suitable.

I hope there's something that she thinks she can't do it anymore on me. I'm such a nice person restoring her believe in humanity and also god. If only she thought she would hurt my feelings sooner or later.

The day when I rediscovered her, she was genuinely happy to see me. She was all over me, smiled so much, kissed so much, with a lot of tongues too. But soon she restored to the calm person as before but with tongues and kisses.

Closure

Margarette when I 1st met her

How do lovers breakup nicely? Casablanca! If you are doing it wrong there will be no closure and huge consequences.

In any other country, we would meet at the place we first met. If it could be ugly, I would pick a quiet time at a MacDonald's that I never went. If it could be violent, it should be a street cafe at Champs Elysees. But in America, you and passersby might be full of bullet holes. That's so sad.

Breaking up with your ATF is even harder. Most likely you don't know each others' real ID. You don't want to leave more than there is.

A nice script will be she inviting him for a quick lunch with short notice. Breaks the news. Give him a well thought of gift to remember. Give him a bulletproof story. Answers all his questions. Leave at the moment he stops crying and trying to be cool again, in an Uber.

OK, I made a major mistake. When she gave me the number to use when I am downtown, I just assume that it was her personal number. If I had doubt I could have asked her and it would be difficult to lie consistently.  When I messaged her first time with that number, the lack of response created doubt. But when I accidentally found her at Whatsapp, I thought it was her personal number and personal account. With an attached face picture of her, it's hard not to think that way. You know young people can text with vivid body language embedded in the words. She told me her period started. And then sick. Booked me, then canceled.  Eventually, she booked me 15 days since I first messaged her. So I never thought it wasn't her personal number and felt so special. And also I can make my phone number ring in any and all of my phones and computer. But it would be very inconvenient to use Whatsapp in different phones. So it would be either her booker or herself, not both unless they pass the phone like in a relay and they live together or see each other very often.

Then it became strange when she messaged me 6 days after we met at her home, using the number that she never responded. The number linked to the Whatsapp account that we used. My immediate response is that this is what bookers do. Why would she call me not even after a week? And her booker must have seen the message that I sent last week and replied that she will be working on the day. He doesn't care who texted. Oh yes, I didn't make a mistake after all. I texted Margarette if she made the text. With some hesitation, she said yes, it was her. If not, that will be her major lie.
I could take shit to get into your home and your personal number. That's why I was totally indifferent to, "I'll do it when I feel like to." I wasn't even complaining.

Since mission accomplished, this time I told her I had to wait for my paycheck to clear. This is a delay tactic and a good bargaining chip when I want discounts. She patiently waited another week and called me up again. So I was supposed to go to her house at 9. She texted me at 7 to see if I can move forward to 8. I could not. She gave me a kiss emoji. There was an event downtown and I was blackmailed and given a dead space to park. It took me over 10 minutes. At 9:01 she texted me to ask where I was, and she didn't want to start late because she had plans after. It felt so bad.

I didn't think much of it because I had been thinking of her pussy all day long. If I think more about it I could have gone home. I could have let her know that is so hurtful. I didn't think enough to be hurt but I feel bad instinctively. It was like she has a split personality, or there were two different persons using the same account. All I thought was going in as soon as possible and how to start kissing her.

The other major screwup is that the doorman was taking on the phone so she had to come down to let me in, thinking that he was not there. She had the screw-up face when she saw him there. And he might have said something sarcastic about cable broken again. I didn't know how it is possible because doorman opens the door.

In the lift, she was standing very close to the door. I had a good look on her outfit and it was very cute showing her bare midsection. I couldn't resist touching her waist. She jumped like I was a homeless man attacking her on the street and pushed me off. So I realized that it's the CCTV. And she was hiding her face by standing very close to the door. The CCTV could be broadcasting to all the residents, or the doorman will be very interested to watch. I understand her reaction but her fast response and her face made me feel like a molester. Once inside, I kissed her as I planned. And she became like another person, the cute nice angel.

I let you walked all over me to get your number and into your house. The last insult is having to pretend to be your cable guy. This is not fair. You don't surprise your clients unless you are sure that it is positive. But your performance was one of the best. And I was like starstruck in your cute apartment. You could have shown me your apartment; it takes about 2 minutes. You were talking about that you like cooking as if you are inviting me to be your sugar daddy. I could have asked how much but I was happy where I was. So you could have ended our last night like that. But you have to call me soon after! If I call you, how disappointed will I be? I want to have sex with my fav but can't anymore. You are not a restaurant. You get there finding it closed. Well, pick another one.

I think you called me 6 days after is for the final tour of my city. I know you don't have many clients like me left. So that is probably for seeing me. You could have canceled the tour when I can't come. I know from your public schedule and available time. But then you have other gigs.

Now call me to your apartment for the 2nd time is money grabbing. That's OK but if you know it's the last time, just be careful to have a good ending. When I have to be the cable guy again I really felt bad but special at the same time. I felt like a looser cable guy. And I don't see how you can see clients or even sugar daddies in your apartment.

I pay good money for it and if it's not enough, you wouldn't call me one more time. When I was late for one minute, you text me to say, "where are you?". That would be sufficient, I could have told you I was trapped in parking hell. And we still have plenty of time left.

But then the message was immediately followed by:

I don't want to start late.
I have other plans.

 It was so devasting even for the 1st meet. I probably won't see this girl again. Even if I forgive you, it will affect anybody's erection. I'm not trying to fit in for a quickie. I have a proper advanced booking when you called me. And you wasn't giving me a discount; I pay full rack rate and leave plenty of tips to encourage better performance.

She wasn't every sorry. She didn't realize how bad it feels. She didn't realize what she did. I had to lookup the messages and told her what she did. She didn't apologize. She told me, "something did come up". That was so hurtful.

The background is that she knows me well; I rarely arrive late. If I was late it will be minutes. I always leave way early. I'm a one shot guy. And she's not the type of cuddling girl. I tried spooning her after but I felt somehow she was uneasy being held tight. And I wasn't the talking guy after sex. So for $5 per minute, it was a good tip if I leave early. I don't think they think of it that way but it would be helpful when you are popular with clients lining up. They love that.

I almost didn't want to forgive you. I don't deserve that. You have been so professional after I rediscovered you. But I figured out how I can forgive you. You have a stripper schedule and indeed you were finding time to fit me in. You want it to be earlier so you can go dancing after. Something came up may means your regular called the club or the club called you to cover others. Or some daddies want to visit you but you can't bump me. That's the sad part. You want to bump me if you can.

That's twice as hurtful already. If you know that it's our last time, how uncaring you are to me. You owe me nothing. But that tainted all my good memories about you. You owe me that. Instead of a good ending, you made me sad.

I have the misfortune to have met Chanel, a haunting beauty that it took years to completely recover. The big unexpected stock holdings help a lot when I was having such good time auditing girls. That was the first time I met Margarette. She didn't cut it though. I was willing to give her a second chance but she disappeared again.

It was unfortunate to discover her the third time. She recaptured my heart in the first few minutes, all kisses, all smiling, all tongue. Only in the last two visits when it dawned on me that I have been fucking a perfect stripper for months and months. I felt the radiation radiating when she was walking near me. It was like a stripper walking into your lap without dancing. I feel like to explode when she exposes her naked body.

Now, look at her picture. From my time in strip clubs, tall blonde model types are good publicity for top strip clubs, but it's her type of small chested perfect body that cause riots in 2nd tier clubs.

How possible is that I can find someone to replace them? A face that can rival Grace Kelly even without makeup plus a riot-inducing stripper body? Even if there is such a thing it will not be affordable by me.

So Epic

Trailer: Once in a lifetime of sin, you meet somebody who is so nice that you started to believe in angels again. You can sin no more. You devote your life to God's will.

Or: The higher you fly, the closer you get to the sun, the bigger the fall when your wings melt, leaving you with a totally broken heart.

Major spoiler alert: I thought I got close to Margarette's heart finally after years of on and off. But she captured my heart and then shattered it into a thousand pieces, so fast so quick that she is a certified natural-born-heartbreaker. Maybe she doesn't even know that, naturally.

I don't know where to start. Yesterday, I texted Margarette trying to see her on the 14th. I never did that to anybody. In Chanel's time, I couldn't. And obviously, she couldn't too. We both have somebody and not much free time. There had been nobody else worth asking for. It could be awkward or you just need to pay more for some festivity feeling.

The girl with the perfect body did ask me to see her and accused me of having a competition more special than her. It could be fun but that was a few days before the 14th so I didn't repeat so soon.

 I didn't expect that I will get Margarette, but I will know her priorities. But I want what I want. Let see how she handles it. If she can't make me happy, I can always time her out and she will understand. I didn't expect success because the last time I wanted to book her, it was drama over almost a month until we finally met. But then she asked me out 6 days after that. I didn't know what to make of everything.

I wanted to wait closer to the 14th so it doesn't seem to be such a big deal if I fail. But I also want to give her more than one week notice. But I get on it sooner because I don't want to waste one more day wondering about the result. I even couldn't wait until the evenings that she would be starting her day. So I opened fired just after noon.

Me: Hey

I paused for dramatic effect. And I wanted to make sure that she is there to get my invite in real time. She was right there as if she was waiting for me to say something.

She: I quitted ............................

I never had such a drama over the phone. She's quitting all sins as if she doesn't know that gambling is a sin too. No escorting, no dancing, no sin. Because God is punishing her enough. She will do everything right from now on ... And then excuses or truth ...

I can believe her, but you need preacher's words to look good on the phone. I was so stunned. My heart was broken and broken further by each of her messages. I had thousands of questions in my head and millions of sad emojis in my heart but I couldn't type fast enough. I know I can't change anything so I wished her good luck and goodbye, a few times though.

But being me the Player, you know what I would do? Yes, instead of a long unposted letter, I messaged her a wall of text out of my stream of consciousness. I told her replying or even reading it is optional. You know how tedious it is to find anything significant in a wall of text. And I told her that we are good anyway.

She did reply, but cannot catch up with the wall of text. And I didn't care about her reply anyway. It doesn't good when she said she misses me. True or not it hurts more! But she did allow all messages to go through and never blocked me so far.  I am grateful when she can be crueler.

How cruel can it be? I know her for years. She disappeared on me twice already. I ran into her again by accident as if God is play games with me to punish me. I've been seeing her for a couple of months, getting better each time, so good that I gave up Chanel II when she turned up again. At the end of the year I finally got her private number I think. I saw her twice at her apartment, the best time so far. I start thinking that we will have a lot more beautiful time after that. And then the 14th approached. 

Blog statistics

I decided to show my page hits to show that not many people are interested to read my blogs nowadays. Because what I posted seemed to be jinxed as if somebody I care is reading the current developments. But who else cares? The page hits are over years of posts. My new posts may have a few hits, mostly myself while writing on and off.

Last time I felt jinxed, I shut up. Then I eventually got the sweetest dream. But when I posted again, it turned into the worse nightmare.

So, although the Chanel character may be well known by all escorts in the English speaking world, nobody will care about Margarette. More, even though I have Chanel's 18-year-old full height picture with a little baby fat that went along with her Citivibe video add, they are forever in a data DVD stored inside a fireproof lockbox. I don't know if they are still there. I would never do things to people that I don't want it myself.

Also, I never described Chanel's appearance in terms of nationality, where she lived, and that sort of identifiable details. My names are all changed to protect the guilty. Time and space are also warped for dramatic effect. Yes, the drama may be a bit off but even if Chanel's boyfriend read it, he may not pick up anything familiar. 

Pimps 2

Pimps are many people's dream job. They recruit pretty or not so pretty girls, train them, keep the good ones for themselves a bit maybe, and even get a lot of money from it.

I never really like them or hate them. I need them for a service and that's that. Until I met this one guy agency where I met Chanel when she was fallen.

My mentor, who I prayed for him to leave me alone, told me that girls like Chanel would be around and nobody would be paying that much money to see her. I just need to wait a bit until she came down. And he was right. Somehow I told Chanel years after and she hated him more.

This agent typically does every other agent are doing. The recruitment is basically an advertisement for $10,000 per week. Or he let other's recruit use his house. Or by word of mouth; when some girls need money fast, they will know someone who knows someone who has clients and a place. That was the 1st wave of internet, the era of Eros and Cityvibe. But these guys stay one step behind competing in their own markets. They don't and can't be big, just like everybody else so they don't stand out, nobody's target.

I actually hit Chanel via CV; she had a video advertisement! I tried to keep that carefully but not sure if I still have it. She asked for a bit higher than the going rate. Two of her friends made it to some local print version of Penthouse so they asked for silly money and guys pay up. My mentor even fixed me up with one of them for a sushi lunch but I wasn't interested; Chanel is prettier. The problem was that Chanel couldn't go all out as in showing her face. For others, it could be an advantage because many girls shouldn't show their face even if they can.

This agent guy was looking up to me and jealous of me, having a good job, having spare money to hit who I want to hit. And girls may run away with me. Since Chanel, he was careful not to let it happen again and tell me that approximately. He wasn't keen on dealing with free agents like Chanel who can hold her own. If he did, he could lose clients like me, a couple of months to a couple of years.

That's the problem with small-time agents. Once he called me up to see Chanel. I knew it was some sort of plot because I was seeing Chanel myself. When I got there, he said Chanel was gone with her boyfriend. So I took it that Chanel had a boyfriend since. But I didn't have 2nd thought about it. Chanel wasn't that good to me then. I also didn't have time for a dinner date, lunch date, shopping that sort of thing. I also felt good because I will rather be me than Chanel's boyfriend. I had no idea how he could deal with it. Years after, I asked about her boyfriend and she told me all about it. But that wasn't the one I was thinking. So I told Chanel how I knew, she looked far away in deep thought. So maybe the agent totally made it up to split us up. Maybe she had an old boyfriend who had unhappy memories of. Maybe she was totally clueless. Maybe she was thinking what could have been if the agent didn't do that.

Once had a nice girl almost as good as Chanel, even with a better body. But he totally mishandled and blew it. He could have made advance appointments and fixed her up with all his VIP's. But he introduced us when I wasn't prepared; I just had a date with his other girl. When I was ready to date her, he said she was gone. He could have warned me to hurry up. But it seemed that he was unwilling to fix us up, consciously or unconsciously, in case he lost me again. He really didn't have anything on her except that she needed money fast. When she got her money from anybody, there was no way he could hold onto her with his abilities. The worse was that he told me how new and fresh she was. He fucked her good until she cum unwillingly. Of course, he could pay or use any excuse like training or testing her abilities. Of course, she didn't want to cum but it came naturally if you let somebody in. I was like this guy is out of his mind. Why you have to tell your client that? Obviously to make me jealous. But why would you do that? I could have switched to another agent. Is your life goal to do better than me at least in one category?

Also, he would show me what girl he would be going to meet for his upcoming foreign trip. And when I told him I had to slow down because of funding, he just didn't believe me. I did wonder if he ever touched Chanel. It would be gross but I kind of interested in his story. I wonder if he managed to DFK Chanel. I didn't think so because that would be a great punishment for Chanel and I am not jealous, LOL. But he never said anything.

When I reminded Chanel of her good old Cityvibe days, she would be very defensive of her "friends". Somehow I was tried to praise her that all her other friends weren't as good as her but then she took it the wrong way, trashing her friends. I didn't know how it came to but Chanel mention their agent's name with respect and obviously, he was a big shot and she seemed to owe him.

That I could not stand. I'm not against big shot pimps, like the one with a model daughter. Girls can respect them if they delivery the VIP clients. But you have to remember there is exploitation. They got a lot more out of your bodies. You don't own them anything. Yes, you get your money and lots of it, but they get away much more.

BTW, her print model friend that I met ended up as an estate agent the last time I heard. She posted on her website saying basically everybody knows what I did so don't bother to blackmail or give me trouble. The other one I saw making a CIM clip on the web. I told Chanel and she told me that she had a kid. I think she is more like helping with her boyfriend's website than doing clips, which wouldn't sell like that. The website was crap anyway.

One day when Chanel arrived full of drama, I tried to kick her out with half the money and would never see her again. She knew it, begged me to stay. I just laid there any way to humiliate her. But then she licked my nipples, blew me, and hopped on me to do a reverse missionary with a smile and moaning soundtrack, all hands-free. Any girl who is "new" may have already been well trained by you know who. It's fancy and fun for a change. I forgave her. But for the regular meal, I will settle for a good pounding and DFK with tongue. That doesn't need much training.

When Margarette looks far away in deep thought for a split second, I knew she was thinking about the good old days when I 1st met her, and when she reappeared the 1st time. I know it was the money.  More than that, the pimp went down with big charges. It was all over the news. The bail was like half a mil. Margarette actually could answer me the question. He was out in 2 years. He must have made big money. He got good lawyers and he didn't even bother to run while on bail. Now he can enjoy the money.

That was the Craiglist era. It was the wild wild west but that's why you need agents to screen out the weeds. Recruitment is mostly over the internet. CL girls want to be on your books if you have clients. You can invite them for interviews or go to see them personally. It's not just CL, but dating sites with hints of compensation and the sugar baby sites. One distinct feature of these pimps is that they can be completely anonymous. They may just appear as booking agents, clients and providers may not have seen him personally. Though the providers would trust them more if they had met personally. But once you got something going, the business can be multiplied by words of mouth over the internet.

Now Margarette must have earned herself a lot of money. She even helps out the newer girls like Chanel II. Yes, they owe it to the agent but don't forget the exploitation there. These guys can afford the best lawyers, and they don't even need to work ever again after a brief moment in jail. They owe it to you, Margarette. You are still struggling for rent.

Of course, I'm part of the problem. But how can you resist these little girls' temptations? The gift of god but not forbidden. I try to be fair and nice so everybody is happy. Since you are far down the road how else can you find the rent? I'm too happy to help. And it's early days yet for you so you could still be anything you want if you set your mind to it. Last time when she told me that somebody wanted to lick her pussy, it struck my cord. I had to ask her to say it again. And do it to my heart's desire. Much better on the 14th.

Pimps

I always like Madams, even though technically you can lump them with pimps. Some are like co-op managers. Some are affectionately called mom, giving life advice and about everything else. Most have been there themselves so they have my respect.

I have been in bed with Madams more times than I would like to admit. Many still got it even at their age. In the old country, I met one who uses one of the bedrooms as her office, with a 6 ft long antique wooden table, in full gear with business jacket suite, stockings, and expensive heels. I didn't sleep with her though. She was untouchable and her girls were top notch.

I have met at least 3 madams that are young model material. One was in Thailand. She looked so much better than her teenish girls. I was naive enough that I never thought of asking for her; I was speechless when we were communicating which girl I wanted. I was just staring at her with my mind wandering off.

The other one wore a low cut short jeans and would lead you up the stairs to see her few girls. Basically, she made you worship and smell her ass before anything else. Her women were just so so. But I came for the legendary woman who gave me so much friction with her tongue during the blowjob, I went crazy without cuming into her mouth. My finger went through her short hair non-stop whispering "you are so good".

When I got out, Madam was still there, gave me a drink and we sat side by side talking. She told me her story of a young person starting her own business ASAP. I know she could be game but very expensive. I was about to bring it up several times when my woman came out, took a look at us and figured out immediately what each of us wants. She walked straight to me, held my hand, pull me away and then sat next to me like a bandage.

The 3rd one has a dad who owns not just an agency, but an empire. It's messed up but obviously, she is untouchable for any amount of money. There is no surprise that she has a beautiful mom. Too often agents go into the business because they can sample the goods.

The ones I slept with was like, after taking a look at me, she says that there were no girls available so early. Indeed there was nobody around except the errand boy. So she asked if I wanted her. Of course, she was just 30 something and attractive. But she wasn't into it so neither did I. She was like feeling ashamed if her girls find out. As if I would tell others how and what she did in bed. So there wasn't something like GFE or I'm your sex slave that sort of things. Just straight sex so I didn't have anything to tell. The errand boy had the duty of escorting me off the door. I think he had the mixed feeling of who is this guy? Wow, the madam did him? Why would he does the madam? What is it like to do the madam?

Now male agents are a lot different. Next post.

Sweet dreams are made of these. I was going in for a marathon kiss with - Caroline - in all her model glory outfit and makeover. But the first thing I felt was what Margarette did to me; she teased my lips with her tongue. So I backed out a little in disbelieve and looked at her. It was like she tried it and it was not too bad.

So I went in for some more and she felt at ease doing it. Then I gave her the full tongue treatment. We created so much friction between out tongue that they could generate sparks.

I woke up with an erection that I didn't realize I had. Thanks, girls. It was not as frequent as I would like nowadays.

What happened in real life was that Caroline posted a model picture that supported that she is spider girl stylish. I didn't think of it much. I wasn't impressed because I know the truth; I don't need any supporting material. But then she got into my dreams.

So don't tell your clients, "where are you? I have other plans after". She is just so mean to me, always. But then I figured it out and didn't hold any grudge against her. I am so thinking of Chanel. I'm pretty sure she would be fond of our times together, for better or for worse. She wouldn't hate me but will remember that I constantly wanted her to make up to me what she did wrong. I should have been more positive.

And then this mystery woman I am thinking of. Someone must have tipped her off; she tried to follow me more than once on the photographer account I created to follow Caroline. I tried to switch her into my client account but she didn't give up on my photographer account. This woman is openly an escort promoting herself anonymously. She is the classic high-end escort type - young good looking fuller model body with pictures at expensive establishments. I could have tried her to solve the mystery if only I had spare cash. How high-end can it be? $750 for 30 minutes? Done that a lot of times without paying that much. Oh, and I think that price point is created so it doesn't stand out too much on your corporate account.

Caroline was supposed to be the last blast but it went on for seasons. Then Margarette came along for the rest of the year. I'm so out of cash. Chanel would automatically stay away if I don't call her for months. But she will call me eventually. Once she complained that I didn't tip her enough. Yes, I did tip her generously depending on my cash flow. Because I didn't pay her the grandfathered rate. She had to find some excuse to go out, making herself all pretty, and let gave me the first fuck of the day. I made it worth her trouble and she seemed happy, except for that one time. I think she offered me a hardship discount when she had cash problems too. But I didn't want to take advantage of her. If I didn't call her that often she knew to let me had my time off.

ps, fuck. Caroline posted that picture on our anniversary. She doesn't post that often, not that good anyway. Maybe she knows some voodoo too.

I got it all figured out. She was misleading because she wouldn't want to tell me the whole truth. So all are forgiven. She did apologize, but not directly for being impatient when I was a few minutes late; I was actually early as usual but caught up in the parking hell.

I doubt if everybody knows how invasive Zucker's apps are. By Whatapp's default, I know when Margarette was on the phone using it. I was trying not to look at it; that hurts a bit when you don't know who she's talking to and what's she is doing. But then that's how I sort of confirm what I think. I just happen to know what one would be doing at 3, 4 am on a Sun morning. Once she told me she went to church with Grandma and didn't sleep when she met me in the afternoon. And there's a good reason for her to fit me in those time for home visits.

And then there's Instagram. Caroline knows I'm very discreet when she gave me her IG account, so I have her life history. She was careful not to follow me back.  But I managed to DM her. Once she replied, I was surprised that I know her every move, like what she liked, and of course when she was online.

I sort of know that Margarette was sorry when she slipped her tongue into my mouth without prompting while we kissed. So I will give her a little present I prepared no matter what. I like to plant something in her home that she wouldn't want to get rid of. That would remind her of me, hehe, for better or for worse. Caroline made a big deal showing me that she hanged the sun catcher and she likes it. She knows how to get people with these small things. Love her for that.

Even if Margarette wasn't that sorry, I doubt if that matters because she has been quite mean to me, LOL. I was so impressed by her that I upgraded immediately when we first met. I was so excited that when my extended foreplay was completed, I had no erection!!! I ended up with an expensive hand job, not the most expensive at $500, but not far. She thought I wasn't going to honor the upgrade. She sent in the cavalry silently via txt when I was putting my clothes on, leaving earlier than I wanted.

But then I am always such an honorable person. And I had worse, a more expensive handjob. I paid what I promised and owed her nothing. She just had enough time to txt a retreat message. By the time I walked out of the bedroom, I saw a blink of a blue light circle around the main door lock. Then I realized it was an electronic lock and somebody just went out, or attempted to get in. When I got outside, I saw a tough muscle guy with a bandera not far ahead of me going to the lift. So we went down together but he was very courteous to me when he dressed like a gang banger. Unreal. When I told her what happened last time, she was very apologetic and thought he must have been rude or scary to me.

And she disappeared on me not once, but twice. When she returned the 1st time, I didn't believe it. I went to check thinking that someone might have taken over her account. But it was her with her signature stocking. Maybe it was the same day that she didn't allow me to change position. She just rode and rode even when I tried to lift her up and away from me. I also try to say something without using any indecent words. I always do that; I never say condom for example. She just finished me off like that. I have yet to ask her what she was thinking and doing.

She still didn't kiss much. But when we got somewhere, she disappeared again. Before that, she mentioned Chanel II for no reason, as if she wanted to get rid of me. The rest is history.

Special occasions

I know special occasions are not a problem for Chanel. If you believe the statistics, from significant numbers to most of her clients would be absent during Christmas, New Year or, say, Valentine. So actually it would be slower for her. If somebody wants to spend the special occasions with her, so be it and have a nice time.

Looking back, I never spent special occasions with Chanel. She would actually know to avoid calling me at those times. Maybe I couldn't get away but really I could spend less money while keeping myself on her short dial list. Also, I almost demand that every meet is a special occasion or else she would know the consequences - time out. But then I'm not a picky person and she could get away with a lot of things just by staring into my eyes.

I can imagine if all your regulars want a piece of you at Valentine you will be in trouble. You win some you lose some.  But then I don't think that's common. I had the woman with a perfect wifeshare provider body accusing me of saving the day with someone else. She is the type with so much confidence that she could get away with anything. I only saw her twice in as many weeks. She could just call her clients up, including me, saying, "Come see me at Valentine!".

I would think many escorts will be getting clueless clients who want some action on special occasions. It isn't any special if you don't know each other. It's just like your homies chipping in to get you a model escort for your birthday. It was so obvious to spot in my old continent.

I got some insights from rideshare drivers. Some just see the money and nothing else. They feel like part of the celebration. Others feel the difference, my celebration or their celebration. Some would rather be with their own friends and family and dear ones. There are two choices. Go for the money or go for your heart. And the latter will be very expensive; you know the price tag.

So there is a sadness entertaining others instead of your own during festive times and you have to keep up your smiles for tips. And if you choose to take time off, you will treasure the moments much more than previous years.