Friday, October 11, 2019

Viagra, Nobel Prize, Prostitution

Yes, you guessed it. Should the Viagra inventors get the Nobel Prize? It can benefit all human beings. Sooner or later a male will not have quality erections as often if anything at all. He could have the same happiness if he chooses to. And his partner gets a good screw too. So much population, so much happiness. So little side effects.

The effect of Viagra on society has long been studied. One phenomenon is that older men go after younger women. Their usual partners or female in their circles aren't that interest. A younger woman provides a stronger visual stimulation.

Let me ask the obvious. Does Viagra promote prostitution? Some young take it as a party drug. Why wouldn't you?

When I was a little younger, I could an instant erection on the streets if I was visually stimulated by some particular imagery. But if I booked an escort I usually need some warmup time and long foreplay to get a hard erection.

It's the same now. But I have fewer erections in unexpected places at unexpected times. I blame it on the proliferation of porn. But Viagra changes everything. I always get a rock hard erection when she takes off her clothes. Or just when I see her in lingerie.

More, it is highly therapeutic. I can make plans to recharge myself and feel good. I don't worry about booking the wrong person. It's almost fail-safe. I won't be feeling bad and sorry for myself after. As long as she looks good, I can resurrect a dead fish and make it scream.

Thursday, September 26, 2019

Slow dance

It all started when I was trying to pick some songs for slow dances with Julia! In her own home. Her apartment is really cute in the evenings. And I got the idea when she told me she likes to cook when she was on top of me after sex.

It wasn't easy as she was very much into music, carrying her boom box with her to hotels! And her taste is very alternative. I have to show good taste and try to convert her. I don't enjoy her music at all.

Worst of all, it has to be good enough to get both of us into the mood, yet there must not be tacky words like love. How difficult is that?

Soon I found out that I'm into rock ballads but many are not suitable for slow dances. Then I came across this band that I never heard of but the song is nice. I wasn't going to pick this little known song by a little known band when there are many legendary works to choose from. But the song grew on me each time I heard it and it became perfect.

Little did I know it was basically the one-time comeback album of Journey. Of course, I love Faithfully but I can't include that or it sounds like a wedding dance.

Sadly, I had one chance to get it done but I thought it was too soon to bring up the slow dances. The next thing I knew Julia dumped me. This became our song and I can never see her again. So sad.
(ps music last forever but music videos are always outdated)

Tuesday, September 17, 2019

Back to College

Not me. It's the time of the year for a visit. I met an incredibly cute girl in the dorm. I didn't want to be get caught looking at her shorts all the time but she shook my hand while we were alone briefly, introduced herself and showed off her bedroom (with other's present). She then retreated to her bedroom reading with her door wide open.

Healthy cute blondes are everywhere, leggy and showing off their mid-sections. She is different. She looks like she's from Alaska. Her face and legs match so she might have no makeup on or very little. Her face looked like a flawless sex doll.

She is on the small side but perfectly proportioned. That's why I can't stop looking at her legs and tried not to go near her initially. I would think she is the perfectly sized sex doll too. Why you want to be feed and fuck simultaneously? When the face and tongue are the most erotic parts?

Wednesday, September 11, 2019


While the music was loud, a barely legal girl came close to me and glued her face onto mine without a word. I almost jumped if she wasn't that cute. Then she held her iPhone in front of your face. It was a selfie.

Can you imagine that? At my age? She was with her friends too? I couldn't stop wondering what she wanted from me. But obviously she wanted selfies and nothing else. She was blonde, slim enough to qualify for the cheer leading squad anytime. And she came from a very nice neighborhood.

It wasn't like a light hug. I could feel her cool flesh pressing on all of my face and I had to counter it with my neck muscle. That wasn't all. I wasn't going to hit on her because, well, I still didn't know what she could be after. I did what I had been doing and didn't pay too much attention to her but acted like I always know her.

But she would stop her raving and came back again, doing exactly the same thing. So I was prepared and greeted her face with the biggest, sweetest smile. That wasn't for her camera but that was what I felt, while still having no clue what she was after. And she certainly wasn't drinking or on something. She left home not long ago and she was very polite and considerate in our conversations.

She did that again and again, once with a studio stick, a portable gadget that if it was on behind you, it felt like the cops are going to pull you over. It must had been over 5 times. Maybe I was very non-photogenic so she had to do it so many times to get one decent selfie. That explains what I saw in the mirror ... But I'm just so popular.

Chemistry is such an interesting thing.

When I first met Chanel, she let me DFK her. But it was like she was shy without response. Or like she was afraid to catch something but she couldn't resist. When I tactfully tried again, she tactfully ducked. I had high hopes for her since because her buddy Julia only gave me a split second lick on my lips after I went after her for months. But when I finally met Chanel again, she did the same thing. It went downhill from there. Since I knew her well she didn't pretend that she doesn't liked to be kissed. Or she now knows well that I am not the type of rich granddaddy that she thought her buddy passed to her. Or she liked to keep some distance because she knew it's hard to get into Julia's shoes.

But I always liked her more. She is prettier with less makeup. And she's looks more like a leggy model than Julia, who turned into a stripper. I liked her flatter chest too. I'm an equal opportunist. She must be feeling inferior with her pair. She likes to keep her top on until the last. But I liked to slip her loose top down to reveal her flat chest. Then I would not be able to control my desire and home onto her nipple, sucking away. But in the end, she wouldn't even take off her top while riding. I wasn't offended and I know it's complicated. She would be very nice to me the rest of times and even asked me to see her again. But I tried enough, did all what she was willing to do, and I blame it on chemistry. You can't hide that.

When I rediscovered Julia, she would look at me eye to eye while riding me. We looked at each other with lust, and smile. And she would bend down to kiss me. She would gave me her tongue. And I sucked all of her tongue into my mouth. And she stole my heart again.

Now, you can say that she turned professional. But it's hard to do the way I see it. When I met someone who doesn't look like their pictures, it's hard to do the eye to eye thing like I love her or I lust her. It's hard to smile too. But make no mistake, I can fuck like she is the prettiest porn star in the world. I can DFK her like she is my new girl friend. But just not staring at her, smiling and kissing.

Caroline looks like a teen model when she choose to. I had an erection whenever I see her legs under her shorts.  I like her schoolgirl blonde hair going glamorous on the occasion. She is flat like Julia but with a softer squeeze. Little did I know she has some sort of eating disorder and she is over 30. It doesn't change anything and it explains why I'm so hot for her. Time and time again I had to unzip myself, let my cock out so as to continue kissing her without hurting myself. Maybe she knows what to do but it takes two to tango.

The most regret I had is losing Apple's number. Young, schoolgirl type but a fallen angel. Everything is covered. No tongue, no eating that sort of things. But when she rode me she would be in a very good mood, all smiling and giggling and she would get down repeatedly and gave me a little wet kiss on the lips. We talked about the future too because none of us would not believe that we won't see each other again. I was using a different app that didn't save her number when I typed her number in without calling.

Green green glass of home

Accidentally, I came across a picture of my house, where all my kids were born. There were born in the hospital like everybody else but this is the place they call home and never left.

I was shocked by my emotion seeing the green grass in front. I know for a fact that the grass was far from perfect as appeared in the picture. But there were not bald or thin patches. And I had people do all the mowing. My first home since birth had no grass, nor any plants. The grass at my 1st house with Mrs Player was really nice, but it was just a decent sized rectangle. In the picture, the house was surrounded by grasses.

Now I fully understand why they call it the green green grass of home. I'm sad that a lot of the grass was gone. The grass on the slope was replaced by plants and bushes instead; that will be a lot easier to mow by myself if I so choose. The other side was replaced by rocks and munches during the drought. Nobody objected so I saved water and mowing.

And sadly, a lot of time since then the whole yard was neglected when I wasn't doing that well. I didn't feel a thing because I was from the concrete jungle. Now the house will look about the same even if you don't spend any time and money on it but the grass is a different thing.

To keep the green grass, you have to spend a lot of water, a lot of other expenses, and a lot of time to mow it. And typically you hire someone to do all of those. So it really is a measure of your state of mind.

Now since I am mourning the grass, may be I should resurrect it for the kids so they have something to remember and something to return to.

I thought of this because how many girls became nomads travelling all over the country? How many left their green grass at home?

In the news a while ago, an Apple Valley native left by being a porn star. She was found dead in her early twenties. The school may look the same as any other high school, only smaller. But the students will be living under the shadow that not a lot are going to college and a lot will not be able to get out of town.

I had a glimpse of Caroline's old home. It looks like mobile homes side by side. But there was grass all over the place. I know she likes her dump now but she should miss her home town too. Her mom and sister are still there.

Julia and Chanel certainly won't miss their old house. They may or may not be coming from poverty but certainly from urban jungles. I actually know where Chanel because she gave me her real number that tied to her extended family and to the area where they come from and still living. Both have a cute little apartment of their own and keeping it is their prime concern.

Thursday, July 11, 2019

Letting go

Chanel (II) is nothing that I expected her to be. She is beautiful but I have seen better. She is skinny but I like model types. But we don't have chemistry. And I don't blame myself. For any other girls, at least I feel popular. For girls that I liked, I have a crush to return.

Chanel isn't the innocent, easy going, straightforward girl that I think she is. Maybe she has been jaded over the years. Maybe she is like that all along when I 1st met her. I just didn't have the chance to find out more about her real character. Now I don't think Julia mentioned Chanel because she thinks we were a better match. She just did it because Chanel is a good friend.

Looking back, Chanel talked a lot after sex and she even chatted with Julia where we were still in bed naked. She asked me if I could leave early making way for her VIP who paid double. This is the same character that I see now.

She doesn't seem to be happy to see me each time. That's really weird. Whenever I met Caroline and my other favorites, we kissed non stop like a pair of kissing fish until I couldn't keep my cock confined in my pants. OK, I admit that a few mishap happened when I booked Chanel. I couldn't get hard and then couldn't cum because I had too much sex and kept torturing her. But I let her off with a handjob more than once. Once I forgot my money in my car. Once I was late for 20 minutes.

And so I thought my charm works on her because she stopped short of asking me to book her again soon. I just did that only to find out the whole cycle never ends.

We talked about exit strategy, I have many options, slow business, many new girls and she isn't as popular as when she is new. But still, she treats me like a job. I doubt if she does treat everybody like this.

Not only that she was never passionate about anything, but she also did less and less. When I was working my charm on her, I knew she wasn't into DFK so sucked her face instead. Then later I found out that she really really doesn't want people to mess up her face makeup. I don't even know she put up lots of makeup. I thought she wears a little makeup and that's why I sucked her face. Maybe she put up a lot of makeup as an excuse to block me. Should I kiss her when she has lipstick on?

And since I have seen her body enough I don't kiss her from head to toe anymore. She takes the initiative, always starts the blowjob without taking off her lingerie. She rides when she likes it and tells me to do the missionary when she is ready. Of course, I let her takes over. But if that's all she wants to do, what's the point of changing.

Julia is younger but more mature. When I worked my charm on her, I did feel successful after a while, just when she disappeared. When we met again by accident, she really grabbed the chance and the rest is history.

I gave Chanel too many chances that I shouldn't. Maybe I did that because of Julie. I want to get back at her. Maybe I want to hear about her even though Chanel hasn't seen her for a long time and may never hang out again except for birthdays. Maybe hearing her history will be good enough.

I should let go. Let go of Julie. And then I have no reason to see Chanel again. We know each other too well. She knows I don't mind being taken advantage of, being stupid. You can say being a fool for her. I should stop. I don't even feel the crush to see her. I dreaded the look of her at the door. 

Tuesday, May 28, 2019

Some people just can't keep a secret

Now I know why. They cannot lie consistently. They could not have remembered what they told who. So they have to tell the truth always. Chanel (I) the professional lier is the polar opposite of Chanel (II), the straight shooter.

It's such a sad story and I hope she doesn't mind if she is reading this. But if she is reading this she would have told me. I think her parents pushed her too hard or the school she went to went too far into the dark side. Her classmates are in ivy leagues. She is not bad herself but she dropped out of college after trying several times. I am not surprised by the way she cannot remember what she has told me.

She told me when to book her again close to her birthday. At the door, I always expect to be a sailor returning to his girlfriend. But she looked at me as if I'm a stranger, just another player customer. I have to break the ice over and over again before taking off her clothes, kissing her, etc. But she would tell me everything after sex, given any chance to talk.

Now I understand why, when we first met, she asked me politely to leave after the sex with half an hour to go so she could prepare for the next VIP that paid her twice as much. I never doubt that she lied but I always wonder how could she do that. It's simple, it was in her mind.

The interesting thing is that Julia made contact with her after a year. Now I understand that they are not fair weather friends. They really help each other out above and beyond friends. I will do that if I have a friend like Chanel and I have no doubt she will return the favor. They didn't talk for a long time most likely because they are struggling one way or the other and don't want the other to know. But you don't forget your best friend's birthday.

Last time Chanel talked about her colorful love life with two boyfriends, and that she was moving into a posh apartment downtown. A few weeks have passed when she realized that it won't work out with her boyfriends. And that she is too young for online dating, attracting not serious dates but losers and cheaters. A few years into the game she realizes that she shouldn't be spending only because she has the money and asked me about jobs and talked about an exit strategy. She didn't make the move.

When I was thinking about Chanel (I), she asked me what I was thinking. So she gave me the chance of talking about her, her rich boyfriend, and how she exited. Chanel (II) realized that she is just another pretty girl amount millions in the big city. There are just too many choices for successful men and most of them cannot resist cheating. At least that's what she thinks.

Now I tend to believe Julia more because she told Chanel the same story that she told me. That she survives only on serving home gambling tables and quitted all escorting. Of course, Chanel didn't believe all of it because the sums don't add up. We all believe that she is still doing something on the side like rich daddies. Or that the big winner got to take her home. But I believe her more because I know more; I penetrated her, Chanel didn't.

Now I really hate to do this to Chanel. She knows now she is my rebound when I lost Julia. She still doesn't know that I prefer her to Julie when we first met. She thinks I prefer younger looking girls and asked me if she looks young enough.

But I love to let Julia know what she has been missing. I now believe that she wanted to keep me. But her apartment won't allow it. She did think about cooking home meals for me in her kitchen. But sadly, I cannot do outcalls and not rich enough to have other arrangements.

As for Chanel, she invited me to pay her home visit. Now she said she won't want to mix business and personal life even though she doesn't have a viable boyfriend. She hinted that she would do outcall for a price but I'm not paying. I don't know if she's aware that if she keeps doing what she is doing, she can't keep regulars like me. Julia did a lot better.

Caroline reminded me of an Apple Valley girl who just wanted to get out of there since kindergarten, the Kansas City of CA. She may be the homecoming queen and prettiest girl in town. Maybe nobody goes to college. She ended up doing porn and dead at a very young age.

For me, I grew up like in Hollywood every day, I joked. And I tended to settle in towns where people fall in love and stayed, again and again. I always owned my house too. I understand that girls like Julia are very much attached to their expensive little apartment. That's their whole world. They see that they are out of Apply Valley every day. But if they fall behind in rent, the whole world collapses.

Caroline is a survivor in her dump, likely with rent protection. She finally got a photogenic boyfriend that is nice, she told me. He looks cool I admit and he is a charmer according to her. She is the trophy girlfriend if her age is right for you and you are not too rich. The funny thing is that she did not have a second thought about seeing me again. Maybe waitressing makes people honest.
A bartender gripped my shoulder in a suggestive way. She is a girl but unfortunately not attractive enough. To others, it looks like a friendly gesture or a form of communication with loud music.

A girl gave me a rose. It wasn't too awkward as it's in the open area with roses growing like weeds. She picked one for herself and gave me one for being nice.

"Do you really like this music?", she saw through me.
"I'm more of a classic rock and roll person.", rock ballad in particular.

Inevitably, she asked me, "How old are you?"
"You don't want to know!"
"Yes, around that.". I can't wait to admit, cause it's a big around.
"You looked young!". Yeah, I know, particularly in the dark.

A young guy, 20's at most, who had an attractive girl with him already, asked me out to another bar to "get laid".

A middle-aged guy pointed to an older guy and asked me to tell him that he is handsome. He is, especially at his age. But I didn't bother to do it without knowing what he was up to. He looked disappointed. Later I figured out that they are father and son on some occasions like birthday. It runs in the family, both are rather handsome. But it means a lot to them if I were to tell them.

Tuesday, May 07, 2019


When she opened the door, Chanel (II) turned her head around quickly and walked back into the room as if she was in a rage. Wow! What did I do to deserve that?

Last time it was all good. Her invitation to her new home was still on. I asked if I could visit her old home before she moved. She said ok too when her boyfriend wasn't around. So I texted her before she moved. I didn't ask to go to her home directly but I gave her a chance. She gave me a one-line response and then none. I knew she couldn't text much because she then had to delete all the conversations in the car. But I gave up. It couldn't work that way. And for the unenthusiastic reply, I banned her for a while.

She then put up advertisements a lot more, several times a week instead of one. Today I woke up and noticed that she was still working. It should be the last morning before she disappears for a few weeks. I decided to help her out. But she had an appointment at the time I wanted. So I tried to rush to get the slot before. It would be silly to wait for the slot after.

I arrived very late. The lift didn't work and I ran up 3 stories high. It was the wrong wing. I never knew there was another wing so I didn't believe her when she told me to go right at the lobby. I ran down and rushed to the other side.

She opened the door like she never wanted to see me again. I proceed carefully. I put the money down and took a shower. And I got on the bed when she was there waiting.

I knew I didn't have much time because I had to leave on time. So I didn't attempt any kisses and conversations and went straight for her breast. She pushed me and left her sexy PJ on. WTF? I was a bit shocked. She signaled me to lie down and gave me a blowjob.

It was tough. If I had anything left in me, I lost it during the high-speed drive there, and then her angry reaction. I couldn't get an erection. Indeed, I was shrinking fast. At least she was patient. But I was afraid to look at her. She didn't smile or talk. She may even look angry. She kept her sexy PJ on. She kept blowing and I kept watching my watch. I was thinking about how to pull out of this. Last time I had good reasons to fail and asked for a handjob. This time I wasn't sure.

Before I asked for a handjob again, my cock began to get bigger. And very soon it was erect. Not the best but erect. She fetched a condom and put it on me without asking. And she started to ride me. No smile.

Almost as soon as she rode me, she said she couldn't do it - it was too big or it hurt her. Before I could ask for a handjob again, she lied down and asked me to do the missionary. OK, so I went in carefully, and minimize body contact in case she went crazy and pushed me. I asked her if she was OK when I began to charge. She turned her face to one side so I couldn't have read her reactions. She never smiled but she didn't say a word either.

I didn't have much time so I charged fast and furiously. But still, in the middle of it all, I whispered in her ears if she was OK. She didn't say a word. I wouldn't dare to DFK her but still, I planted a kiss on her pretty face.

Actually, it was a good fuck as I didn't have any distraction. I concentrated on fucking and I came, with time to spare! I gave her a little kiss on her face and rolled over. I looked at my watch and I still had time left.

Now, she was all smiling! And laughed at me for being fast. But it could also mean that she didn't have enough. She was like just eaten a ton of honey and started talking. She told me her schedule for the whole month, birthday, day trip, 1st cruise trip, family, period, boyfriend, etc.

I told her we should meet again for her birthday. She was happy to. So she does want to see me again. So this is what happened. She was jealous of Julia and angry at me because I didn't see her for so long. So I must have been with Julia. And then I was late for her.

Now I know her more. Can be two different persons.