Tuesday, July 28, 2020

What does the Player do when not ordering women from catalogs?

A plumbing disaster with a happy ending.

I do still look at catalogs every day but there is nothing worth me to go for pandemic sex again. Ladies who I picked will give me an erection by just standing there with few clothes on. Great lovers will burst my pants by just kissing me. The problem is what can I do with them now?

A pair of great legs? I can't lick and watch all of them all the time, can I? I don't think I'm a breast man but the easiest picks are youthful good looking breasts with appetizing nipples. I have something to fall back on when all else fails.

I've been told that some girls pierce their nipples to avoid people motorboating them. Probably true. When I get hold of a nice pair, I will lick and suck the hell out of them, testing their limits gradually. Jordan, whom I hang out with a lot, has a nice pair. All of sudden she showed me her piercing with a chain. I hated her so much that I left her immediately and didn't return her call. 

She scammed me a few times that I didn't mind at all. For all the money that I spent on her including shopping at H&M and dining at Olive Gardens (Also MacDonalds), I am still ahead compared to what she had to offer. She is the one who humbled Chanel in a double. I can't forgive her the day when she agreed to take a shower but deliberately avoid walking on the paper towels I laid down from the bathroom to the bed.

I only touch the plumbing when it's necessary, or when I catch up with everything and there's money in the bank. You will understand why. Once in a blue moon, the criteria were met. The drinking water system is barely working and the extended tax deadline is still months away.

First, the drinking water faucet seems to be leaking. It's the job I most hated, working under and at the back of big deep sinks. 

Second, the shut-off valve to the system is broken and seems to be not fully turned on. To replace it, or any plumbing parts, I have to unscrew it first, which is impossible. Also, it's a non-standard part so I just screwed it on. There's no easy way I can unscrew it without damaging the pipes.

So it's easier to cut off everything and replace the main shut-off valve under the sink. The problem is, that's the first major plumbing job I did because it didn't shut-off completely due to old age. That became the oldest valve in the house when all other valves were gradually replaced with the newer quarter-turn ball valve. I still didn't replace it because there's no more copper pipe to cut. I have to break into the wall.

To ease the pain, I decided to finally get rid of the garbage disposal. I have been wanting to get rid of it for years and years. It looked like a huge screw to me. If I can't unscrew a tiny nut, how can I get rid of it? If it's gone, I have to replace the sink drain as well. I didn't know if the drain is integrated with the sink. Do I have to replace the sink too? 

But of course, it's easier and cost-effective if you replace the whole sink. The problem is, my sink is cemented into the tile worktop. If I hire someone it will be over a grand. And I have to clean up everything first which is a lot of work. I might just as well remodel the whole kitchen. Moving up seems to be not so bad.

Then I discovered that sink drains are standard, replaceable. So the buck stops there.

After the disposal is garbaged, I have to reinstall the drain pipes. I had the chance to replace them with a low profile design to fit in more gadgets under the sink, my original goal to remove the disposal.

So in summary, I have a few known unknowns and unknown unknowns. I ordered everything and picked the ones that I will have meaningful use of the sink when something goes wrong. When the essential things arrived at my door, I started work.

Just as I expected, I couldn't remove the disposal. It seems to me that the neck can be cut off to access the sink drain. You know what? I still waiting at the red lights on the right turn lanes like an idiot. I still turn left at the green, barely avoiding collision and receiving many horns. I brought out the jigsaw to cut off the disposal. I was prepared to buy a new reciprocal saw but the jigsaw worked. It's clumsy and messy. But I did it.

Next, I couldn't unscrew the 4-inch screw of the sink drain of course. I noticed that it's plastic, so I figured out that I can saw it off without sawing into the sink. And I did it with the jigsaw. All the while, I didn't remember there is a thing called an oscillator tool and I had it in the garage. It's a lot easier and cleaner if I remembered.

After replacing the drain, it's the pipes so I can use the sinks and everything else. I picked a flexible one-piece design for twin sinks so I have the sinks operational at once. That's the first mistake. It's foreign-made that is not completely compatible with what the US plumbers do here. The listing is simply wrong. I only ordered it because the only alternative will take a few days to arrive.

It surprised me that the better drainpipe system is available in Homedepot, but not the one closest to me. Without the use of the sinks I can't cook and I can't eat without outside help. So I risk the deadly virus to venture outside and into the store with my $50 mask.

But it didn't seem to work for all my troubles. The main drain pipe is at the corner instead of the middle so the whole setup will be asymmetrical if it ever works. The flexible pipes were either too short or too long for the sinks. After some trial and error, I concluded that I have to go to the stores again to get some pipes. Before that, with one accidental twist, the flexible pipes exhibited themselves beautifully like two strands of DNA crossed with each other in the middle under the sink.

Cutting off the old main valve was next. That was the moment when I remembered that I had an oscillator tool and what it's for. It surprised me that I used it so many times, more than any other saws combined. There's no way I can use any saws to cut the pipes almost flush with the wall.

The cut was a bit raw but I had high hopes on Sharkbites. So I pushed the valve a little bit into the wall and prayed that it bit. When I turned on the outside main supply again, water gushed out fiercely. All I could do was giving myself one more attempt before giving up. I couldn't do anything simple because the pipe was inside the wall except for a few mm.

So I knocked a bit off the drywall so the valve wasn't obstructed. And I pushed. This time around, it seemed to work. It wasn't even leaking so far. I do have to seal off the wall again but that's for another day. The most dangerous moment had passed. Nothing can stop me now. The new valve connects to the dishwasher and the new reverse osmosis system valve flawlessly. Why I needed all those is another story.

The real work began removing the faucet. Although the screw is tiny, it's still impossible to unscrew it. I don't believe in sprays. If it even works it will probably take hours and days that I don't have. Although tiny, I couldn't use any ordinary wrench behind the sink.

I search the Internet for new tools for the job but there isn't any. I rarely used my sink wrench since I installed the faucet. So, fortunately, it was cataloged and I could find it in the garbage. 

It didn't work or I have no stomach for it. Not again when I remembered the pain last time. I was only screwing it on, not off. 

So I searched Youtube for inspiration. A guy cut off the whole faucet from the top with a grinder. But his faucet seemed a bit flimsy when mine seems to be a piece of solid metal. I can always have a go with my oscillator tool. I remembered that I got a powerful blade that can cut everything but the blade on the tool seemed to be rusting. I don't know. I won't be able to find anything if it's not in the database. So I hope the blade is the best I've got and it works.

Initially, the blade grinds in gradually. There was metal dust but it wasn't anything like a saw. It seemed to be going nowhere in the middle of the faucet. Just when I prepared to go to the shops to get the best blade I can, the blade went through a lot quicker once it passed the middle of the faucet with the greatest diameter. Another job was done great, annoying the whole house for an hour on and off.

Everything works. The last job was to connect the dishwasher air gap to the inlet at the drain pipes. To my horror, it was the same hose that connected to the disposal. I cut off the hose too when I cut off the disposal. The hose was in the way. There is more. When I tried to remove the broken hose, I pulled too hard and the plastic air-gap snapped and fell down. If only removing anything else is that easy.

Luckily, I was to replace the air-gap, which is arriving in a few days. This is the only model with an extra air-gap for the faucet. My faucet has one because that is only allowed in my state. I don't use it because it's very noisy. It's very annoying like people clearing their throats loudly at random times. The bigger air gap will be less noisy and easier to install.

One more thing. If I know better, I would have ordered a faucet with plastic nuts that can be unscrewed at the top. My faucet is the same old design but I have nothing to worry about for the next decade. The dishwasher air-gap already is.

Despite everywhere is wet under the sink, I only have a hole unfilled on the sink. And I cannot use the dishwasher. That's a happy ending. But after I warned everybody about the hole, it dawned on me that I have the new technology called clear duct tape, previously known as repair tape. The big hole is covered at an instant, completely waterproof too. As for the dishwasher, I can always bring the hose to the sink when I use it. The air-gap is coming tomorrow and I already have the new hose to go with it.

Time to replace the filters when there is money in the bank. There are a lot more choices now but the brands I used are still in business, the best. The filter replacements are way overdue. The membrane is due too. The tank may last longer but I have to repressurize it at least. I needed a clear housing for the sediment filter so I will have more incentive to change filters on time. But I have to buy the whole bundle for the best. So, inadvertently, I replaced the whole system from the valve to the faucet in one stroke except for the tubes. It's more expensive than a typical system but I have the best.

What have I done? But it's too late now. The orders are placed.

I wonder how many will be interested in my plumbing adventure. If you so desire, I will update when my dishwasher air-gap arrives and the whole reverse osmosis system.

But then I like to see the same girl, or the same type, doing the same things that I most enjoy, with the same equipment that I have.

Life is an aggregate of experience, which continually surprises us - Ron Carlson

When I saw Kat the 2nd time, her makeup is totally different but I liked a lot more. It's a pretty model vs a cute teen. Both are heavy in the sense that every flaw was covered up to look perfect. There's nothing wrong with her 3D outline.

When I licked on her youthful nipples they got an erection. When I fucked her good with a full erection, she screamed OMG! When I tried to kiss her goodbye she gave me a lingering kiss. I had to rinse and repeat. But when I saw her the 3rd time she revered to the girl I met the first time. I didn't even try to kiss her goodbye. I think they are different persons.

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