Wednesday, January 04, 2012
Two new year fantasies
The popularity of anal hair removal triggered my memory of an old boys talk with a dentist in training, about promoting full body anesthesia with the tag line - "you won't remember a thing". Of course he will be offering it to attractive patients who worth his efforts.
I'm fantasying to open a beauty salon, specializing in hair removal, and in particular anal hairs. First, my reassuring assistant, a motherly figure like a experienced nurse, will make every patient sit on a scanner. It's a bit medical looking equipment to draw from a CAT scan, but in reality it's really a scanner, the sort you use on desktops to scan pictures.
Of course they have to take off their panties and spread their legs. Sit in thin air and then on the scanner surface. Of course patients will never be shown their real scans. If their arse pass the scan test, my assistant will bring out the doctor, me, in full professional gown and makeover.
I will not offer full body anesthesia because I don't think I can get away with it. I will take a couple of minutes to explain that anal hair removal is a very delicate procedure, requiring that my laser probe has to be stabilized by as many fingers as possible all the time, around very sensitive areas that patients are not used to be touched. All this time I will be waving the probe like a wand for the hypnosis effect, and moving all my fingers in an artistic manner all over. That means I am not going to use a glove and her silence means acceptance.
My assistance can do the job for male patients.
It can't happen in real life unless you are a full time hair remover. For the hassle you can do at most a patient or two every other day, and you probably have to find an assistant who will blow you afterwards.
Now turning to something that could actually happen. To marry a whore.
Never really think of that before. And it seems to be too impossible to think about it. Not long ago I was the sort of guys who only want to marry virgins.
Now in a remote, disconnected, calm, distance, rational state, I can say that's not that impossible. All I need is a way out of my miseries, and a way in, the right whore.
It's not about sex and fresh young meat. It's not because Chanel is still well under 30. My wife will still win some putting them in a lineup, despite decades of age difference (about two). In school uniform my wife will have the upper hand. Chanel turns out to have a very beautiful face, after losing her baby fat since 19. But my wife isn't at all weak.
I tend to forget about age. In the last Halloween, when I took my kid out to trick and treat, I still got candies because I was in costumes.
Chanel's boy friend is just over 30. I think I ran into them once. And like Chanel, I have no problem dumping him given half the chance. But for Chanel, dumping him could mean a life of poverty, ending up like some of her "colleagues", and nobody cares.
I'm still attracted to any one of them from head to toe. I am sure about Chanel because she finally let me suck her toes and proud of it. Can get near her ears though. I am not that sure about my wife because I remembered I did but in recent memory I couldn't get her to take a bath together and then suck away.
I can still kiss any of them passionately as if making out in the back seat. I know Chanel takes my tongue as a service, but that's good enough. It's better than my wife who doesn't tolerate it. Perhaps Chanel is more than providing a service. You need some connection and acceptance to start being DFK's in the first place.
There are so much screwed-up people, or you can say incompatibility. I know what the worse Chanel will come to. Take my money and run? There's an app to avoid that. She doesn't really like me? Maybe better than my wife. I'm certain that I will not marry my wife the 2nd time. But Chanel is like dating for a couple of years (it seems), and I think I know all of her daemons. No surprises.
The alternative? Like the single blond mother who showed off her bikini body in front of me in the swimming pool? It's the same thing. If I am not perceived as rather successful, nobody will bother. Not Chanel. Not my wife. And if I am more than rather successful? Single blond virgins, or college girl gone wild.
Can I live with her past? In hind hind sight, it's not that difficult. Far from her numbers, I have done some women. Some are gorgeous but some I cannot be proud of. (in the middle of the night, no alternative other than my own hand job) And I know and have seen how's it's done. If you need money quick, and you got a good madam, it's almost condom to condom doing incalls. I have ran into clients and pimps that are rather repulsive.
Some men are into wife swapping. But I'd rather find a whore myself.
It's funny how Japanese categorize their porn stars. Some don't do sex and show the three points. The censored stars have higher status than those uncensored ones who have to probably make the movie outside of Japan and the uncensored version is for export only. Age from under aged (no sex, no points) to as mature as you can get while still attractive to some. No points, censored, uncensored, amateurs, non-pro, civilian? All in the mind.
Despiting satisfying all the male fantasies, the young girls are still behaving like angels. The matures are so proud being able to make a porn movie. Indeed all are proud. For some it's like souvenirs when they are at their prime. I don't think they have trouble finding eligible mates.
I have another girl, about the same age as Chanel, who likes to dress up and go out with me. She even invited me to her local Starbuck alternative in the evenings. It's like a cross between a Paris cafe and a British pub. It's a place to look at other people, get dates, get laid, and show off their gadgets. There are high school kids who were doing their homework, gossiping on Facebook, but mostly are younger professionals who would be proud to discuss the last book they read. But somehow we didn't click. I like her, sure. Her body? Great.
But it's Chanel who got my heart somehow. Once I booker her in the morning. I was on her chest recuperating after sex. Then I discovered that I lost a few hours of time. I remembered we were talking. If not, I would have accused her of giving me date rape drugs. Then she asked me to lunch. Then we lost a few more hours in the restaurant until all other patrons left. I'm almost sure she was up to something. But I can't complain. If we don't get along she could have pulled out any time. I wasn't bribing her with anything other than the meal.
OK, back to now. Looking for kindle books for kids.