Thursday, August 17, 2006

Getting old

When I was younger, just a couple of years ago, a girl looked down at my dick and said with envy, "So small!". I wasn't surprised at all because I knew she was referring to my waist. I had confident then. She wasn't bad at all. Indeed she was late 20's to 30, with an 18 year old body. It must have been terribly hard to keep it up. So she envy me because I didn't need any effort to keep my waistline. I eat well and eat everything, and my little tummy showed that.

Recently a girl looked my dick and said, "So big!". I was surprised because how dare she was insulting my new beer belly. PL did make fun of it, but I knew her for a long time. Then I was surprised about my own reaction. She was indeed talking about my dick, just like so many girls before. I knew I was getting old then.

My new beer belly was the result of one non-alcoholic beer each day for roughly a year. Before that I rarely drink beer because I would go to sleep whenever I drink. Wine keeps me thin I think, but still I sleep a little. When I discovered the only one non-alcoholic beer that actually taste good, I switched to it and didn't lose any time on sleeping. But I forgot about the beer belly, even though it isn't beer. Now it's too late. My previous little budge in my tummy looked sexy in comparison.

Recently, when we talked face to face, naked, after sex, PL advised me to do some plastic surgery on my lower eye 'lid'. Her friend had that surgery, among other things, because he just got himself a young girl friend at 30. I didn't know how to response as her words hit me in several directions at once.

First of all, I responded with something like, "Does the look of patrons matter to you?" It was a reflex self defense; looking back it was an insult to her. I know I should be a little bit pleased - perhaps she cared about or at least noticed my looks, which was not as good looking as before.

Time and time again, I think she calls her patrons 'friends'. But I never challenged or corrected her on that, because then I would have to tell her that I'm jealous. I don't know if she would call me friend behind my back. I hate that because she didn't treat me like a friend, though we had so much history. And if she really regards her other patrons as friends, I am really jealous. If she is simply trying to be discreet by substituting patrons with friends, I am OK with that.

Talking about this and that patron is walking on thin ice. If she says this patron give me this nice dress, that's fine. Either I will think he is a fool or I will buy her a better one; normal stuff. But think about it, I'm jealous if her patrons tell her so many things and she remembered it. It took a long time before she opened up to me and I opened up to her. How come she knows so many patrons when she is supposed to be not taking new clients, and once she said only a few good ones will do for now?

Until recently, I looked 10+ years younger than my age. A couple of years ago, they still check my ID occasionally when I buy cigarettes or wines. My teeth are far from neat and they are yellowish because I smoke sometimes. I know Americans are obsessed with perfectly neat white teeth, but I don't think I need to fix that because of my other good looks. The other reason is that if I don't quit smoking altogether it's a waste of money. More importantly, just using whitening strips all of a sudden will arouse suspicion.

Just last year, a 21 year old girl was combing my hair with her fingers. She was saying, "so soft", and in reality it was, but she was also counting my hidden white hairs to figure out my age. Time and time again girls with milk white silk smooth skin ask me how come my skin is so smooth and one in particular was examining my skin within an inch of her eyes, looking for my secret formula. If only she knew I just had a massage before, with vaseline based massage oil applied all over me. After that, a shower with Dove.

Now I must realize that instead of looking into my large beautiful eyes, they have to look at my loose lower eye lid first. Instead of looking at my long legs they are hit by my beer belly first. Instead of my sexy lips, they will notice the not pure white teeth first.

Candestine call girl's blog entry triggered my thoughts. I would think any suggestions about improving appearance would be welcomed. The eye lid surgery suggestion hurt a bit but if she put it with a little bit of skill it would well taken.

How about patrons suggestions? I had a few girls asking me if I like this or that. But in general they don't listen much and it's dangerous to put it to them. I don't know why but we are well qualified to give suggestions. We pay to see them after all. I'll start another entry for call girl enhancements.

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